When the Knight Finally Comes Part 2

Second post done! Here is the continued chronicle of the Great Efum Entrance...


One day Efum came over after church. We had fun talking, studying, playing around. Then he randomly said, I'll be right back, and went out with my dad for a minute. Needless to say, I was rather curious. They came back from the garage after about 5 minutes and I thought, "What could they possibly have talked about in that short a time?" After a little while Efum left to go home and eventually my parents casually sat down on the couch, where I was writing. I was sitting on the couch writing and Mom and Dad both sat down with me. Oh boy. Dad, being the good straight-to-the-point kinda dad he is, got straight to the point. “Well, Ethan asked today for permission to court you.” Before I could say anything we heard Laney scream from the bathroom and then she ran in with a huge smile on her face. My brain just emptied in shock. The parents asked me what I thought and I said I liked the idea of courting Efum. Daddy said he did too, and that he and Mom had been praying about him and had had their eye on him for awhile. Whoa! How neat I thought! We called his dad to schedule a date where we all could talk about it. “I just need to make sure his idea of courting is the same as ours” my dad said. I knew very well that he thought the same as we did about courtship--as a pure, lasting relationship that is not easily thrown aside. I knew my dad was prepared to give Ethan permission. And I think I was in shock, but it was a different kind of shock than I have previously experienced. Before this I would suffer lack of appetite and shakiness due to shock, but now it felt like my mind had just been wiped. It felt like walking out of the ACT. I had only one rational thought for two long days—that I knew I would court Efum. That God wanted that. For some reason I imagined God kind of doing the universal “I-know-something-and-I'm-not-gonna-say-anything-about-it” face. Trust me, I'd gotten to know that face REAL well that past month or so on God and several other people that had suspected Efum's intent. I really wanted to think or feel something--I wanted to be excited, or maybe ditzy--but my head just could not wrap my itself around what was happening...this had certainly never happened before.

Finally, two days later we were in the car on the way to Efum's house. I still wasn't able to think, though I knew very clearly what was going on and what I would be committing to. That was all God—emptying my brain, yet keeping necessary content intact. We pulled up to the house and Dad prayed in the car. It made me feel a little less jittery and nervousish. We got out and knocked on the door. The only thing I remember seeing at the time was Efum standing in the hall waiting for us. Mom, Dad, Efum, his parents and I all went and sat in the living room and small talked for awhile (I don't remember a single thing that was said then, my stomach was freaking out). After a short while, Efum and I were dismissed with his big brother Caesar so the parents could talk alone.  Then I talked with his wonderful parents while he spoke with mine (it was fun hearing each other's sides of the story at this part, even though the same thing happened). We talked about what we thought courtship was all about, and our views on marriage and commitment, etc. THEN....a knock at the door. *GASP* Butterflies invaded my whole insides and stayed there. Before I knew it I was outside walking beside Efum with our moms walking far enough behind to see, yet not hear. Efum said, "I've gotten permission from your dad, but I need to ask you personally...do you really want to court me?" Well YEAH!  I had waited my whole life to be asked that. I knew how special and important it was. I said, “yes, I'd love to”. I had finally met my knight. He had finally come for me.

When the Knight Finally Comes Part 1

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, my knight came to sweep me off my feet! His name is Efum. My Efum to be exact. God sent him to me with a label and a pretty bow :) I have decided to tell the story in parts, as I had no idea I would ramble on so much when I first got started :) So, without further ado...

I have always wanted to be a Mommy. Ever since I was playing with dolls as a little tyke I wanted to have my own babies. I always wanted to get married. My sister and I would dress up and play wedding (the groom consisting usually of a boy doll or eventually our poor toddler brother). But of course, the true meaning of marriage was hidden beneath all the floofy, too-large play dresses in my six year old mind. I didn't even think about what getting married really was.

That changed as I started getting older of course. I eventually came to understand that marriage is a life commitment to someone--a covenant. A vow before the LORD to love, honor, and obey a special person with your whole heart, unconditionally, pleasing the LORD for your ENTIRE LIFE. Matthew 19:4-6 is what Jesus says on the subject..." 'Haven't you read,' he replied, 'that at the beginning the Creator "made them male and female," and said, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh"? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.' " Once two become one flesh, they cannot be separated without ripping apart. The movie FIREPROOF illustrates it with salt and pepper shakers glued together.

So, as far as waiting for that certain someone went, the Disney movies were enough to convince me that I did not want a prince. Some girls always talk about waiting for their "Prince Charming". I feel sorry for them—what is a prince but a rich and spoiled brat who has a lot of people to do his bidding, just because he can sing and can have any woman he wishes with a snap of the fingers? Sorry prince people—you aren't my type. Even as a little girl, I dreamed of one day belonging to a knight. A knight works and trains for the sole purpose of defending damsels in distress. I noticed that if knight wanted a lady he did not resort to singing and kissing her while she slept—he usually had to slay a dragon to save her or perhaps outwit an evil wizard. He worked for her. He won and earned her heart, he did not play with it using flowers or fancy music to wheedle her into loving him. He even wore awesome shiny armor and weapons, how great is THAT? Okay, so maybe my view of the prince species is pretty bleak, but my regard for knights was always so intense it made up for it! Even as a little girl I wanted to wait for the perfect knight to come and sweep me off my feet. I always sat wide-eyed during medieval history lessons.


One Christmas Eve when I was 14 I think, Daddy called me into the living room after bedtime hours. The coffee table had egg nog glasses and was decorated pretty with a tablecloth and candles. My parents and I sat down and talked about boys, purity, and the heart. I knew what it all meant—we had had the conversation before. I got my purity ring that night, when I gave my growing-up heart to my Daddy for safekeeping. I didn't think much about it being a difficult thing at all—eventually my knight would come, ask my daddy for my heart, Daddy would give it to him, happily ever after, the end. I went to bed that night as a happy little girl.

A year passed. I truly started growing up. I learned that it is impossible for dolls to keep their rightful place in a girl's heart. I learned that chocolate truly does positively influence a girl's hormones. I learned that mood swings were real. I learned whole new aspects of God. I grew closer to Him. I made amazing friends. I learned that boys get tall amazingly fast, and that girls get curvy. I also made a more unpleasant discovery...boys were, for the most part, total jerks! This puzzled me—how could any of these ever be true knights? What if knights really did not exist, as some said?

Then the move to Colorado when I was 15. Pain and suffering. Just about the worst year of my life. So many hard things about it for the whole family and it's a long story. It was in Colorado that I grew up (some of the way :) )and became who I am today. But one thing gnawed at the back of my mind for the whole almost three years that we lived there. “How could the LORD bring me a knight HERE?” As it turns out, not only is Denver very bad at producing men worthy of second notice, but it's apparently also incapable of producing men of marriageable age at all. Though that was simply a personal observation. I had guy friends in church who were all at least ten years older than I. I had guy friends in the homeschool group who were at least five years younger. Absolutely NOTHING in my age range at all. But actually, I did not mind. Every Meggy friend in both Arkansas and Colorado knew that Meg was the last chick to walk around needing a man. I knew it too. Sure I wanted a knight, but that was way far into the future. I wasn't thinking about it, though according to my Arkanesian sources, every teenage girl was getting a little too interested in the abundant supply of the opposite sex. I just rolled my eyes. Looking back, I see how fortunate I was that the LORD took me out of the company of any future suitors and put me in a place that was bereft of men. I was not even able to ever be tempted, but the whole time I was hearing of my friends' man experiences and learn everything I needed to know from safely across the country. I do not even want to know what the LORD must have saved me from, and I am so thankful and blessed for my time in Colorado.

Then we moved back. All right LORD. It's hard to move of course, and I would miss many things about Denver, but Arkansas was always home to me. But I wasn't sure then why we had moved there and then back again. I knew it was of God, but his logic remained a mystery to me.

Literally as soon as we returned, guys started showing slight interest in me. But thanks to the fact that I had been in a man-free place for a few years and studying (from a safe distance) the drama in man-central, I knew the drill by now. I had my excellent brother jump on their case and scare them all away with menacing glares in person and death threats on facebook. They left. Shabang, that was easy. As a side note ladies, if you don't have an older brother about you, improvise. Little ones are pretty handy as well for this kind of thing :)

Then a friend of mine offered an English and Creative Writing class (to this day I tell her that this whole thing is mostly her fault :P). My mom asked me if I wanted to take it and I loved the idea! In that class was a boy I had not seen for years, and had certainly never spoken to. I knew who he was from seeing him in his father's Hebrew class years before, and the same thing that happened then was now happening in this writing class years later—God was pointing him out. It was like the feeling of someone just randomly pointing at a person, slient and expressionless, leaving you somewhat confused about what is going on. I ignored it at first, but every week I felt it more and more. This quiet man with a beautiful smile, a silent laugh that warmed me right to the soul, soft and sweet brown eyes, and a passionate love for his Savior kept being brought to my attention. Finally I just threw up annoyed hands. “LORD...what are you wanting? You're just pointing and telling me nothing else! You've never done this before, what is the deal with You lately?” But no answer. I rolled my eyes and ignored it some more. Apparently I wasn't doing anything I shouldn't, or not doing anything I should do—God would have told me if that was the case. So I shrugged and put it away. Now I think God was trying to wait on His own timing, but couldn't stand the beautiful secret and wanted to give me a hint ;) One day my big sissy randomly told me that she heard that Efum wrote novels. “NO WAY!” Said I. “That's awesome!” Ever since moving back I had been without my writing buddy...I had been spoiled and now I was dying for another one. I asked Efum if I could read his stuff. He agreed and I delightedly read and critiqued his amazing first novel. He in turn read some of my things, encouraged me so generously, and helped me out in so many ways. We wrote a short story in a group together. We kept getting onto the same writing teams. Somehow we got to talking. He shared his testimony with me and I was blessed and amazed. He inspired me to love my Savior even more. Simply talking to him made me praise the LORD. Not to mention he made me laugh. I then figured that God must be pointing because He knew that Efum would be an amazing friend to me. People started telling me that he and I should get together, because we were a perfect match. I started getting teased, but didn't pay any attention. I knew that if he ever asked to court me I would agree because of his amazing character, but I was trying not to think of him that way.


How does this story end? Er, continue? Stay tuned my fans! More to come! :D

Show and Tell

Today I was prepping for teaching my co-op class. Today my boys were going to learn how to "show" things in their writing, not just "tell" them.

Example:

"Paul was very angry when he came into his room"

as opposed to:

"Paul's face turned beet red with rage as he stormed into his room, muttering evil things and kicking the furnature."

The first tells you about it. Very clearly and concisely. But you can't really understand exactly what happened until you read the one that SHOWS you about it.

So I'm getting all the prints and activities loaded up for class and I'm thinking about how this relates to sharing our faith. We can TELL about the love of Christ till our teeth fall out. But if we do not SHOW it--if it does not shine through us, how are people really to understand? That's something to admire about the disciples when they were telling their friends about Jesus after they had first met him. Their main line was, "Come and see!" They knew they couldn't fully tell about how amazing Jesus was. They didn't flounder for words or argue about how many good things possible could come out of Nazareth. They were ready to SHOW them their new master. Sometimes just words don't do it. Letting God's love show is what really counts. Has anyone ever noticed that our God is really really hard to try to describe? :)

The things God does.......

God is love.

He is the very incarnation of love.

Love wouldn't exist were it not for him.

He is incapable of evil.

His word proves all this.

He has never done anything wrong.

He has never made a bad decision.

None of his plans have ever been foiled.

He has good in mind for each of his children.

He doesn't plot harm to any of them.

Everything he does is part of his plan and glorious purpose.

He loved us enough to take the penalty for our sin.

After all this and more, it seems impossible that we wouldn't be able to trust everything he chose to do. It sounds silly to say that sometimes I wish God would do things differently.

God my hero

Two things we should establish right at the start: Number 1 - I am a big sucker for knights. The sense of "awwwww..." I have when I read all those stories about the damsels in distress and the knights ride in and kill the bad guys and save the girls is the one hopelessly romantic streak in my body. When you have a knight at your side nothing TOO terrible can happen, because he is just drooling for the opportunity to save you. Same with a Dad or anybody that cares about you that happens to be bigger and stronger than you. Nothing can be all THAT bad because there is a hero standing by!

Point two - moving is quite scary and uncomfortable and unpleasant and sad and all those horrid things. Especially when you've no place to go and don't really know why you are going. Yes, there are good parts about going, but we're not at those parts yet, so now is all the bad. For some reason my mindset was that God sitting back watching all this stuff happen and thinking that I shouldn't be feeling how I am about it. Sort of a, "Well fine if you feel that way, you're doing it anyway, so you'll get over it." Don't know why I thought this - God certainly didn't say it. But after I realized this was what I was assuming, God showed me that first of all, he had been the ultimate hero in coming to earth as a human and dying in my place so that I could be with him forever. And now he wants to be my hero in my everyday life! He is waiting for when he can rush in and save me and give me good things and make me feel better.

So now, I'm not so worried about what could or could not happen, because I have a hero waiting for me to be in trouble so he can rescue me!

What Is Life All About?

The Google search, "What is life all about" has gotten quite a few hits. The very top result is users.aristotle.net, which explains thus:

"You cannot be classified as useless, because you aren't really supposed to have to make yourself useful. Look at the natural world. What is the use of a tree? Well, it has many uses, but it isn't TRYING to be useful. There's the difference. It's just doing what it wants (or so we assume) and in the process of doing that it does its job in the natural order of things. Despite all the rantings of moralists, you are in the same boat. The only way you are ever going to do an ounce of good in the world is to do what you want. Do what makes you happy, or at least what distracts you from your misery.
How, you may ask, does doing what you like do any good? Look around you. Look at people who seem to be trying very hard to be useful. Are they really doing good things for people? Or do they make everyone around them miserable with all their moral uppidyness and incessant busy bodying? I suspect it is the latter. The people who really do others some good are the people who are doing what they like and who aren't very interested in being useful. They are usually interesting to be around, because they are doing things that interest them. They are often fun to be around, because they appreciate fun and know how to laugh and not take anything too seriously. They inspire other people to figure out what it is that they want to do by example, thus causing more people to be interested in life and interesting to be around, fun loving, etc.
Out of all the people we meet in life, these people who are doing their own thing are the people who have the most profoundly positive impact on us and thus make our lives richer in the most fundamental, meaningful way. Can you really call that useless? Sure, working in a soup kitchen will feed people, but if you're being a martyr about it because you don't really want to be there, everyone around you will see right through you and hate you for being moralistic and insincere, and you will end up doing more harm than good. So, revel in your perfect uselessness. It's the useful thing to do."

There are other explanations of equal feeble-mindedness and absurdity for different reasons you may be asking why you exist. They all bash "the moral enthusiasts", God, and anyone that is trying to do something with their life. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen! Does this explanation of what your life is not disappoint you? Don't you want to have a purpose? Don't you want to know the TRUTH?

Have I got good news for you! You are NOT useless! Or worthless.

If you're wondering about the meaning of life, read the book of Ecclesiastes. If you think life is meaningless, you will find that many elements of life are. Wisdom, pleasures, toils, advancement. Some of these things ARE life to many people. If you live for them, your life is meaningless. But in the last two verses of Ecclesiastes, Solomon states the conclusion of the matter, the meaning of life.

"Fear God and keep his commandments,

for this is the whole duty of man.

For God will bring every deed into judgement,

including every hidden thing,

whether it is good or evil."

That is the duty of man. Fear God and keep his commandments! Trust and obey! It's not, "do what makes you happy" because pleasure is meaningless as well. You will only find fulfillment if you carry out God's plan for your life. He's excited about it! You can be useful to God of all things! Are you ready to find life and find it more abundantly? Do justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God. And you are not worthless - to God you are a precious, special gem. There is so much more the Bible has to say to you - why don't you give it a shot?

"So let's just praise the LORD..."

Have you ever prayed without asking God to do something? Not saying that God gets tired of us asking Him to do things, but we all like a conversation without requests for stuff don't we? Ever just told God how awesome He is? I don't do it nearly often enough, but today I found a Psalm that doesn't ask God to do a single thing - not even "deliver me from my enemies"!:D

Psalm 66

Shout with joy to God, all the earth!

Sing the glory of his name;

make his praise glorious!
Say to God, "How awesome are your deeds!

So great is your power

that your enemies cringe before you.
All the earth bows down to you;

they sing praise to you,

they sing praise to your name."
Come and see what God has done,

how awesome his works in man's behalf!
He turned the sea into dry land,

they passed through the waters on foot—

come, let us rejoice in him.
He rules forever by his power,

his eyes watch the nations—

let not the rebellious rise up against him.
Praise our God, O peoples,

let the sound of his praise be heard;
he has preserved our lives

and kept our feet from slipping.
For you, O God, tested us;

you refined us like silver.
You brought us into prison

and laid burdens on our backs.
You let men ride over our heads;

we went through fire and water,

but you brought us to a place of abundance.
I will come to your temple with burnt offerings

and fulfill my vows to you-
vows my lips promised and my mouth spoke

when I was in trouble.
I will sacrifice fat animals to you

and an offering of rams;

I will offer bulls and goats.

Come and listen, all you who fear God;

let me tell you what he has done for me.
I cried out to him with my mouth;

his praise was on my tongue.
If I had cherished sin in my heart,

the Lord would not have listened;
but God has surely listened

and heard my voice in prayer.
Praise be to God,

who has not rejected my prayer

or withheld his love from me!

Poeticness

"Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered, so we must die. But God does not take away life; instead, he devises ways so that a banished person may not remain estranged from him."

I know, I've posted about this one lots of times. But reading at Christmas time is perfect (and besides, it's my favorite:P). God does not take away life! He devised a perfect way that we, banished by sin, may not remain estranged from him - sending his son down to take our punishment.

And here is a stolen post from Stone of Help that echoed my thoughts perfectly and was so perfect for the moment...

"God, I am in Love with you. I desire nothing but you. I want to die so I can see you right now face to face. You have my all. Where else can I go? You not only have the words of life, you are the lover of my soul. There is no way I can be taken out of your hand. Hardship may come. Doubt and pain likely lie before me. But come what may, I choose to say blessed be your name. I am yours.

You are faithful... when I am faithless. You are strong... when I am weak. You are impassioned... when I am apathetic. You just ARE. period. And I can't get enough of knowing you.

I pursued you and found you where you were to be seen. But there were places I did not look. Places I thought were out of bounds to you. (Imagine that) That is why I was in awe to find you within me, shaping down to the depths, guiding up from the abyss, and emerging victorious! I was shocked to see you in my own reflection. But I am not shocked anymore. I believe what you have told me. I know who I am. I am yours. I see that it is true! Lord, point me where I am to go.

You patch the broken vessels. You breath life into the dust. You restore that which was fallen. I am living proof.

Don't just be in me, Lord Jesus. Live in me."

Even when the future seems hopeless...

"I remember my affliction and my wandering,

the bitterness and the gall.
I well remember them,

and my soul is downcast within me.
Yet this I call to mind

and therefore I have hope:
Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;

therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,

to the one who seeks him...

For men are not cast off

by the Lord forever.
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,

so great is his unfailing love.
For he does not willingly bring affliction

or grief to the children of men."

God does not willingly bring trouble on us - he is good to those whose hope is in him. He hasn't left us out to dry... even now.

Psalm 45:10-11

"Listen, O daughter, consider and give ear: Forget your people and your father's house. The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord."

Our church did a ladies' Bible study once that talked about these verses. It talked about God being enthralled by our beauty and calling us to his side. When God calls us, we can run to Him with reckless abandon, leaving our former lives in the dust! It's time to be with God and live a whole new life!

I don't know if I described that well at all, it sounded much better in the study:Z

Why Should God Listen To Me?

Lately I've been thinking about what I do for God - it ain't a lot. I've been thinking, "Why should God ever do anything for me? What have I done? Why should he listen to my prayers? Sometimes I don't even see what he wants for me!"

Then I read these two chapters of Psalms. I will write here the highlights, if you will.

"Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens,

your faithfulness to the skies.
Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,

your justice like the great deep.

O LORD, you preserve both man and beast.
How priceless is your unfailing love!

Both high and low among men

find refuge in the shadow of your wings."

"Trust in the LORD and do good;

dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the LORD

and he will give you the desires of your heart."

"But the meek will inherit the land

and enjoy great peace."

"for the power of the wicked will be broken,

but the LORD upholds the righteous."

"The wicked lie in wait for the righteous,

seeking their very lives;
but the LORD will not leave them in their power

or let them be condemned when brought to trial.
Wait for the LORD

and keep his way.

He will exalt you to inherit the land;

when the wicked are cut off, you will see it."

That first "Third Day" verse really jumped out. His love reaches to the heavens - even when we don't see it, or realize it, or when we sometimes don't even care.

Isaiah 40-44

What kind of book is Isaiah? It's full of prophecies and judgements, and that's what it's mostly associated with. But in these four chapters, there were a lot of passages about God's love for his people. Here are a few:

" 'For I am the LORD, your God,

who takes hold of your right hand

and says to you, Do not fear;

I will help you.
Do not be afraid, O worm Jacob,

O little Israel,

for I myself will help you,' declares the LORD,

your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.
'See, I will make you into a threshing sledge,

new and sharp, with many teeth.

You will thresh the mountains and crush them,

and reduce the hills to chaff.' "

"Comfort, comfort my people,

says your God.
Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,

and proclaim to her

that her hard service has been completed,

that her sin has been paid for,

that she has received from the LORD's hand

double for all her sins."

"Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The LORD is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary

and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."

God just showed me today that God loves ME. Me. As a singular person. And that should be good enough for me - what right do I have to complain about anything when the creator of the universe loves ME?

Romans 13-14

The title of this passage was, "Love, for the Day is near".

Verse 11 says:

"The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light... Clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature."

Here is an excellent video that goes well with these verses.

Love one another.