Step Through

I should be studying for Typography test...

2011-02-07T19:29:00.000-08:00

But the people I love don't love each other.

Or try to understand each other.

And I'm tired of explaining people to people.

Especially when they turn into vicious monsters of stubborn closed-mindedness every time.

So I'm resigned to letting themselves figure each other out.

But that makes me sad.

Cuz it effects a lot of people.

In a negative way.

School is complicated.

It's too cold to not be snowing outside.

And my 5-wearable-shirt lineup is getting old.

The car is busted.

And it's my fault.

And it's a lot of money.

And that busted my dream of Lasik surgery over the Summer.

I am sick of glasses.

But not as much as I can't touch my eye.

By the way my glasses busted too.

The cookie jar's busted.

And that one's not quite my fault, but no one saw, so it is anyway.

And I wear the cone of shame.

And am considering installing a kitchen in my room so I never have to come out or see a human for the next 3 months.

I haven't had a real Sunday night date in a month with no end in sight.

And my guy works our first Valentines Day.

And the day before that.

And the day after that.

And....probably the day after that.

All that to say, there won't prolly be no substitute Valentines Day for this chick.

Which stinks cuz she loved Valentines Day WAY before she had a man.

I wanna eat chocolate.

But I don't do that cuz I really don't want to.

But I still wanna.

And that makes me sad too.

And Satan is pulling the whole God-provides-what-you-need (aka food and air)-and-don't-care-bout-what-you-want trick.

Again.

And now it's late.

And that upsets me.

Guess I should go study.

That's upsetting.

I can.

2011-01-05T21:26:00.000-08:00

I can't wait four years.

All there is to that.

But you know what?

The Holy Spirit says that it can wait 40 years if necessary.

And you know what else?

The Holy Spirit lives in me.

The end.

Now shut up you people.

I can.

"I have a bad feeling in my core about this."

2011-01-03T20:06:00.000-08:00

This quote from my brothers' extrememly corny BIONICLE movie is currently true in my life. Even worse, its toward another human being.

It's not anybody who will likely be reading this, so don't go thinking whether it is you or not. But it's a very interesting bad feeling I've got going on.

It's not really resent.

It's not really jealousy.

It's not really pride.

It's not really annoyance.

It's not really anger.

I don't know what it is, I just know that it is an I'll feeling that does not belong in the heart of a child of Christ. I'm praying about it, and trying to think of some ways to change my thinking about this person. Any ideas?

Passed Over

2010-08-02T12:47:00.000-07:00

We all know about the first passover spoken of in the book of Exodus.

Then Moses summoned all the elders of Israel and said to them, "Go at once and select the animals for your families and slaughter the Passover lamb. Take a bunch of hyssop, dip it into the blood in the basin and put some of the blood on the top and on both sides of the doorframe. Not one of you shall go out the door of his house until morning. When the LORD goes through the land to strike down the Egyptians, he will see the blood on the top and sides of the doorframe and will pass over that doorway, and he will not permit the destroyer to enter your houses and strike you down.

~ Exodus 12:21-23

This time when I read the passage it leaped out at me--Jesus is my passover lamb. In this case in Exodus, the angel was coming to smite those who had done wrong. But God commanded the Israelites to put the blood of a lamb on their door so that they would not be killed along with the Egyptians. Think about it--even from that time, thousands of years before the Savior, God was giving signs for us. The Israelites would never even understand the significance of what they were doing at the time. Jesus's blood has protected us, God's chosen people, from being punished along with the unbelievers.

I have heard that before, but this time it really meant a lot to me. And here's the part I didn't notice. In Psalms 34:20 it says, "not one of His bones shall be broken" talking about Jesus. Then in Exodus 12:46 God says not to break any of the bones of the passover lamb. Whoa. Isn't it so amazing how God uses these things to speak to us, thousands of years later, just to remind us how mighty He is?

God is my Helper

2010-07-22T14:06:00.000-07:00

God is my everything.

God is all-powerful.

God is all-knowing.

God is always loving.

God is ready to give me His words.

God provides for my everyday life.

God gave me a wonderful family.

God gave me an amazing guy.

God gave me beautiful friends.

God always watches out for me.

God is always ready to help me obey Him.

God protects me from harm.

God gives me the little things that I don't even need.

God knows what I do need, and He's never left me without it.

God always loves me.

God always forgives me.

God sent His son for me.

God does not lose His temper.

God is always there for me

God always hears me when I talk to Him.

God always pays attention when I talk to Him.

God does not just ignore me.

God is faithful to tell me what is right.

God always wants the best for me.

So why then...

do I be selfish?

Why do I be disobedient?

Why do I forget to be grateful?

Why do I snork around when things don't go my way?

Why do I be impatient?

Why do I sin?

Why do I not pay attention to God like He pays attention to me?

What I do not want to do, I do.

LORD, help me always to be alert to You. Thank You for loving me.

When the Knight Finally Comes Part 2

2010-07-12T12:57:00.000-07:00

Second post done! Here is the continued chronicle of the Great Efum Entrance...

One day Efum came over after church. We had fun talking, studying, playing around. Then he randomly said, I'll be right back, and went out with my dad for a minute. Needless to say, I was rather curious. They came back from the garage after about 5 minutes and I thought, "What could they possibly have talked about in that short a time?" After a little while Efum left to go home and eventually my parents casually sat down on the couch, where I was writing. I was sitting on the couch writing and Mom and Dad both sat down with me. Oh boy. Dad, being the good straight-to-the-point kinda dad he is, got straight to the point. “Well, Ethan asked today for permission to court you.” Before I could say anything we heard Laney scream from the bathroom and then she ran in with a huge smile on her face. My brain just emptied in shock. The parents asked me what I thought and I said I liked the idea of courting Efum. Daddy said he did too, and that he and Mom had been praying about him and had had their eye on him for awhile. Whoa! How neat I thought! We called his dad to schedule a date where we all could talk about it. “I just need to make sure his idea of courting is the same as ours” my dad said. I knew very well that he thought the same as we did about courtship--as a pure, lasting relationship that is not easily thrown aside. I knew my dad was prepared to give Ethan permission. And I think I was in shock, but it was a different kind of shock than I have previously experienced. Before this I would suffer lack of appetite and shakiness due to shock, but now it felt like my mind had just been wiped. It felt like walking out of the ACT. I had only one rational thought for two long days—that I knew I would court Efum. That God wanted that. For some reason I imagined God kind of doing the universal “I-know-something-and-I'm-not-gonna-say-anything-about-it” face. Trust me, I'd gotten to know that face REAL well that past month or so on God and several other people that had suspected Efum's intent. I really wanted to think or feel something--I wanted to be excited, or maybe ditzy--but my head just could not wrap my itself around what was happening...this had certainly never happened before.

Finally, two days later we were in the car on the way to Efum's house. I still wasn't able to think, though I knew very clearly what was going on and what I would be committing to. That was all God—emptying my brain, yet keeping necessary content intact. We pulled up to the house and Dad prayed in the car. It made me feel a little less jittery and nervousish. We got out and knocked on the door. The only thing I remember seeing at the time was Efum standing in the hall waiting for us. Mom, Dad, Efum, his parents and I all went and sat in the living room and small talked for awhile (I don't remember a single thing that was said then, my stomach was freaking out). After a short while, Efum and I were dismissed with his big brother Caesar so the parents could talk alone. Then I talked with his wonderful parents while he spoke with mine (it was fun hearing each other's sides of the story at this part, even though the same thing happened). We talked about what we thought courtship was all about, and our views on marriage and commitment, etc. THEN....a knock at the door. *GASP* Butterflies invaded my whole insides and stayed there. Before I knew it I was outside walking beside Efum with our moms walking far enough behind to see, yet not hear. Efum said, "I've gotten permission from your dad, but I need to ask you personally...do you really want to court me?" Well YEAH! I had waited my whole life to be asked that. I knew how special and important it was. I said, “yes, I'd love to”. I had finally met my knight. He had finally come for me.

When the Knight Finally Comes Part 1

2010-05-30T20:57:00.000-07:00

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, my knight came to sweep me off my feet! His name is Efum. My Efum to be exact. God sent him to me with a label and a pretty bow :) I have decided to tell the story in parts, as I had no idea I would ramble on so much when I first got started :) So, without further ado...

I have always wanted to be a Mommy. Ever since I was playing with dolls as a little tyke I wanted to have my own babies. I always wanted to get married. My sister and I would dress up and play wedding (the groom consisting usually of a boy doll or eventually our poor toddler brother). But of course, the true meaning of marriage was hidden beneath all the floofy, too-large play dresses in my six year old mind. I didn't even think about what getting married really was.

That changed as I started getting older of course. I eventually came to understand that marriage is a life commitment to someone--a covenant. A vow before the LORD to love, honor, and obey a special person with your whole heart, unconditionally, pleasing the LORD for your ENTIRE LIFE. Matthew 19:4-6 is what Jesus says on the subject..." 'Haven't you read,' he replied, 'that at the beginning the Creator "made them male and female," and said, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh"? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.' " Once two become one flesh, they cannot be separated without ripping apart. The movie FIREPROOF illustrates it with salt and pepper shakers glued together.

So, as far as waiting for that certain someone went, the Disney movies were enough to convince me that I did not want a prince. Some girls always talk about waiting for their "Prince Charming". I feel sorry for them—what is a prince but a rich and spoiled brat who has a lot of people to do his bidding, just because he can sing and can have any woman he wishes with a snap of the fingers? Sorry prince people—you aren't my type. Even as a little girl, I dreamed of one day belonging to a knight. A knight works and trains for the sole purpose of defending damsels in distress. I noticed that if knight wanted a lady he did not resort to singing and kissing her while she slept—he usually had to slay a dragon to save her or perhaps outwit an evil wizard. He worked for her. He won and earned her heart, he did not play with it using flowers or fancy music to wheedle her into loving him. He even wore awesome shiny armor and weapons, how great is THAT? Okay, so maybe my view of the prince species is pretty bleak, but my regard for knights was always so intense it made up for it! Even as a little girl I wanted to wait for the perfect knight to come and sweep me off my feet. I always sat wide-eyed during medieval history lessons.

One Christmas Eve when I was 14 I think, Daddy called me into the living room after bedtime hours. The coffee table had egg nog glasses and was decorated pretty with a tablecloth and candles. My parents and I sat down and talked about boys, purity, and the heart. I knew what it all meant—we had had the conversation before. I got my purity ring that night, when I gave my growing-up heart to my Daddy for safekeeping. I didn't think much about it being a difficult thing at all—eventually my knight would come, ask my daddy for my heart, Daddy would give it to him, happily ever after, the end. I went to bed that night as a happy little girl.

A year passed. I truly started growing up. I learned that it is impossible for dolls to keep their rightful place in a girl's heart. I learned that chocolate truly does positively influence a girl's hormones. I learned that mood swings were real. I learned whole new aspects of God. I grew closer to Him. I made amazing friends. I learned that boys get tall amazingly fast, and that girls get curvy. I also made a more unpleasant discovery...boys were, for the most part, total jerks! This puzzled me—how could any of these ever be true knights? What if knights really did not exist, as some said?

Then the move to Colorado when I was 15. Pain and suffering. Just about the worst year of my life. So many hard things about it for the whole family and it's a long story. It was in Colorado that I grew up (some of the way :) )and became who I am today. But one thing gnawed at the back of my mind for the whole almost three years that we lived there. “How could the LORD bring me a knight HERE?” As it turns out, not only is Denver very bad at producing men worthy of second notice, but it's apparently also incapable of producing men of marriageable age at all. Though that was simply a personal observation. I had guy friends in church who were all at least ten years older than I. I had guy friends in the homeschool group who were at least five years younger. Absolutely NOTHING in my age range at all. But actually, I did not mind. Every Meggy friend in both Arkansas and Colorado knew that Meg was the last chick to walk around needing a man. I knew it too. Sure I wanted a knight, but that was way far into the future. I wasn't thinking about it, though according to my Arkanesian sources, every teenage girl was getting a little too interested in the abundant supply of the opposite sex. I just rolled my eyes. Looking back, I see how fortunate I was that the LORD took me out of the company of any future suitors and put me in a place that was bereft of men. I was not even able to ever be tempted, but the whole time I was hearing of my friends' man experiences and learn everything I needed to know from safely across the country. I do not even want to know what the LORD must have saved me from, and I am so thankful and blessed for my time in Colorado.

Then we moved back. All right LORD. It's hard to move of course, and I would miss many things about Denver, but Arkansas was always home to me. But I wasn't sure then why we had moved there and then back again. I knew it was of God, but his logic remained a mystery to me.

Literally as soon as we returned, guys started showing slight interest in me. But thanks to the fact that I had been in a man-free place for a few years and studying (from a safe distance) the drama in man-central, I knew the drill by now. I had my excellent brother jump on their case and scare them all away with menacing glares in person and death threats on facebook. They left. Shabang, that was easy. As a side note ladies, if you don't have an older brother about you, improvise. Little ones are pretty handy as well for this kind of thing :)

Then a friend of mine offered an English and Creative Writing class (to this day I tell her that this whole thing is mostly her fault :P). My mom asked me if I wanted to take it and I loved the idea! In that class was a boy I had not seen for years, and had certainly never spoken to. I knew who he was from seeing him in his father's Hebrew class years before, and the same thing that happened then was now happening in this writing class years later—God was pointing him out. It was like the feeling of someone just randomly pointing at a person, slient and expressionless, leaving you somewhat confused about what is going on. I ignored it at first, but every week I felt it more and more. This quiet man with a beautiful smile, a silent laugh that warmed me right to the soul, soft and sweet brown eyes, and a passionate love for his Savior kept being brought to my attention. Finally I just threw up annoyed hands. “LORD...what are you wanting? You're just pointing and telling me nothing else! You've never done this before, what is the deal with You lately?” But no answer. I rolled my eyes and ignored it some more. Apparently I wasn't doing anything I shouldn't, or not doing anything I should do—God would have told me if that was the case. So I shrugged and put it away. Now I think God was trying to wait on His own timing, but couldn't stand the beautiful secret and wanted to give me a hint ;) One day my big sissy randomly told me that she heard that Efum wrote novels. “NO WAY!” Said I. “That's awesome!” Ever since moving back I had been without my writing buddy...I had been spoiled and now I was dying for another one. I asked Efum if I could read his stuff. He agreed and I delightedly read and critiqued his amazing first novel. He in turn read some of my things, encouraged me so generously, and helped me out in so many ways. We wrote a short story in a group together. We kept getting onto the same writing teams. Somehow we got to talking. He shared his testimony with me and I was blessed and amazed. He inspired me to love my Savior even more. Simply talking to him made me praise the LORD. Not to mention he made me laugh. I then figured that God must be pointing because He knew that Efum would be an amazing friend to me. People started telling me that he and I should get together, because we were a perfect match. I started getting teased, but didn't pay any attention. I knew that if he ever asked to court me I would agree because of his amazing character, but I was trying not to think of him that way.

How does this story end? Er, continue? Stay tuned my fans! More to come! :D

Oh the Faithfulness of God!

2010-04-12T20:42:00.000-07:00

Can you believe the love and faithfulness of our Savior? It sounds cliche, but guess what? It's not.

"Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands." ~ Deuteronomy 7:9

"O LORD, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done marvelous things, things planned long ago." ~ Isaiah 25:1

"May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine upon us" ~ Psalm 67:1

LORD, thank you for your plans and your perfect faithfulness in carrying them out for my good. I trust you and love you more than anything. Please keep me in your plan.

Captured by TOBYMAC

2010-04-08T19:14:00.000-07:00

From his great new album....

I'm Your prisoner by choice

I will rest at Your feet

And I'll only lift my voice

When You want me to sing

It's the beauty of Your covering that's stealing my heart

And it's the mystery of You that tears me apart

If I should die before I wake

I pray the Lord my soul to take

And if I should get a peaceful sleep

I wanna wake at my Father's feet

All I wanna do is get into You

You got me captured

By Your love

All I wanna do is stay here with You

You got me raptured

Can't get enough

Let's go

The sun's on the rise

The sleep's in my eyes

The dew's on the ground

The night is disguised

There's hope in the air

I'm fresh off a prayer

The blue mountain bean is clearin my stare

I make recompense

It's all making sense

Like blood in my veins

You're my sustenance

A moment of trust

Your gift is my gust of wind

Til we meet again

So faith, don't fail me now

If you touch my heart

You can feel it pound

So faith, don't fail me now

You got me, and You won't let go

Possession

2010-04-06T12:51:00.000-07:00

These past two weeks, I've come to realize something about myself.

I am, in one way, like a dog.

Our ginormous deaf great dane likes to lean up against his people--mostly my dad and sister. He'll lean, or go between their legs, or otherwise touch them to claim them as his people.

Well I've discovered these past two weeks that I do it as well, when people that are not my possessed people are around. Especially ones I don't know very well, even on neutral territory. I have to be touching one of my sibs or Mum or Dad when I'm standing next to them, or I grab one and hug him quick as he walks past. And if we're at home and someone is in the house with us, I definetley always have to know where Daddy is at all times. I never even realized I did all this until we had someone over for lunch after church for a couple of weeks. Now, thinking on it, I see that I do it even when the person that's over are good personal friends of our family. Unless it's my Wingboyz, my Bekah or my Emy (cuz they count as "in my possession") I'm hugging on my people when others are around. I think it's equal parts "claiming" as the Dog Whisperer would say, and having the feeling of protection by this person I'm touching. I asked my sibs if they'd noticed my touchy instincts and they all said, "Oh yeah, you totally do it. Not that I've ever thought about it, cuz I'm kinda used to it, but yeah you way do it". It's all struck me as rather curious, since I've never thought about it before either and I've been doing it for years.

But in our women's Bible study at church jumped out at me--God has a possessive circle too! He's territorial and has a clear sense of what is His and whose He is. Ya know how I know? Just look at how He loves to introduce Himself--"I am the LORD your God", "I am the God of your fathers", "I am the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob", and of course "You will be my people and I will be your God". He does it an AWFUL lot. And He says that He is a "jealous" God, which is not a sinful envy, but I think it means more to the extent of what we're talking about here. It's fun to have found a whole new way in which I relate to the LORD, and it is SOOOOO wonderful to know that I am His and He is mine! :D

And on another note...well, don't you just LOVE my God? I've been praying for no rain these past two days, since we have a huge, unreschedulable picture shoot outdoors today. It was supposed to rain just as we were getting started, but I've been asking Him to hold back the rain all day, and so far the chance of rain has gone down to 10% :D Isn't it amazing how God loves us enough to care about these little things? :)

I wanted to post a poem...

2010-03-29T21:46:00.000-07:00

But then I realized that I don't have the rights to it anymore! I won it's publication in a poetry contest! :D It felt cool to just now remember that I couldn't post it up here, I must say :) Oh well, I'll post something else :)

Have you ever been only SLIGHTLY offended by someone? I mean the kind that leaves you half chuckling, half horrified, wondering if you are angry, then thinking you aren't, then that you are depending on what time of day it is. Usually that sort of offended is brought on by a person who has had the habit of offending you before, or at least half offending you many times. After many offenses, anything iffy said by that particular person makes your automatic reaction to be, well, offense. Whereas if any other person said that same thing you would have thought it truly funny, or true, or not even paid any attention. BUT *gasp* that guy said it!!!! Now you just HAVE to think the worst of it!!!!

I had never much thought on this topic before, until a good friend brought it to my notice. Of course it is a true fact, at least for me. After all, that person had said/done whatever before and it was offensive, so why shouldn't I be offended now? But this reaction is sin. Each new offense should be treated as the first one, since the others were so forgiven.

Ephesians 4:32 ~ "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."

Matthew 18:21-22 ~ Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.

Matthew 6:14-15 ~ "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

That last one's a little scary huh?

One cannot write alone...

2010-03-26T11:30:00.000-07:00

Writing a novel is a team effort :) I am writing the dedication for Of Shattered Things before I turn in the final copy, and had sooooo many people to thank. I'm sure I didn't cover everybody!

Thank you to:

My LORD and Savior, for giving me the passion and ability to write, and for being with me through every paragraph.

To my parents, for always encouraging me in my writing and giving fun ideas. I love you both!

To Christen Krumm, for being such an excellent writing teacher and for making sure I get my chapters written whether I wanted to that week or not. Thanks for everything Christen.

To Ethan Riley, for his amazing editing and admirable forbearance in having to read this whole novel in it's
rough state, and for always being ready and willing to give ideas, advice, and fight scene tips. Thank you,
Mighty Wordsmith.

To Laney, for being my ear to brainstorm in and my partner to word war with. Love you, bug.

And finally, for the original idea for this story and for always being a friend, I'd like to thank my sweet, talented Cherise Mabb...

I mean, Alena.

The LORD has declared it not good for a writer to be alone, and hence He has given me all these wonderful people to be helpers for me :) Thank you for all of them LORD, and for being with me Yourself! :D

Proverbs 2:1-11

2010-03-25T20:44:00.000-07:00

My son, if you accept my words

and store up my commands within you,

turning your ear to wisdom

and applying your heart to understanding,

and if you call out for insight

and cry aloud for understanding,

and if you look for it as for silver

and search for it as for hidden treasure,

then you will understand the fear of the LORD

and find the knowledge of God.

For the LORD gives wisdom,

and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.

He holds victory in store for the upright,

he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,

for he guards the course of the just

and protects the way of his faithful ones.

Then you will understand what is right and just

and fair—every good path.

For wisdom will enter your heart,

and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.

Discretion will protect you,

and understanding will guard you.

Mr. Sneakypants

2010-03-24T12:59:00.000-07:00

One bad day, David had to flee from Saul to escape his ill-founded wrath. He went to Ahimelech the priest to ask for supplies and recieved bread and the sword of Goliath.

After he escaped, Saul pitched a fit as his officials. He sat under a tree and screamed, "Listen, men of Benjamin! Will the son of Jesse give all of you fields and vineyards? Will he make all of you commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds? Is that why you have all conspired against me? No one tells me when my son makes a covenant with the son of Jesse. None of you is concerned about me or tells me that my son has incited my servant to lie in wait for me, as he does today."

But one fellow, Doeg the Edomite, had been skulking in the shadows of the temple when David had been there. He stood up and said to Saul (I assume in a Grima Wormtounge kind of voice), "I saw the son of Jesse come to Ahimelech son of Ahitub at Nob. Ahimelech inquired of the LORD for him; he also gave him provisions and the sword of Goliath the Philistine."

Saul growled in anger and sent for the priest and his whole family to come before him. When he beheld a line of the priestly family standing before him and said, "Howdy there, priest. Why have you given my enemy provisions, and thus put yourself against me, your king?"

Ahimelech threw up his hands. "What are you talking about?" he said. "David was always your right hand man! If he's now your enemy, leave me out of it, because I have no clue what you speak of."

"Suuuuuuuuuure you don't." Saul looked at his guards. "Kill them all"

But the guards would not touch the priests of the LORD--they knew it was wrong, even though their kind had commanded it. So the king next turned to Doeg, the skulking one. "Kill them!" he screamed.

So Doeg smiled, and murdered the priest of the LORD and his family. One son of the priest escaped to tell David what had happened, and David said, "That day, when Doeg the Edomite was there, I knew he would be sure to tell Saul."

For some reason I had never noticed this guy before. Didn't remember him. But I was quite intrigued by what I found. This man evesdropped on David and the priest, told Saul, then murdered the LORD's anointed priestly family. I also wonder what all he had done before this, to earn such a reputation in David's eyes.

"He who plots evil will be known as a schemer. The schemes of folly are sin, and men detest a mocker."

Proverbs 24:8-9

Pray for me...

2010-03-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

My heart is not 100% right towards a particular person. We shall call him/her "Sydney" because it is a guy and girl name and I have no friends named Sydney. Sydney is not someone who is close to me, nor would it be exessively GOOD if Sydney was close to me. The two of us don't cross paths very often, but it's not like I don't like Sydney. He/She just has some things that he/she does that require me going away from my fun to take care of he/she is doing. It is nessecary action and I don't really have a problem doing it. But my heart is not having the best attitude towards Sydney right now, because I know Jesus wouldn't think this way or make any form of jokes about it. It's really no biggie, just please pray that I wouldn't think/feel this way or accidentally make others feel this way either :)

A thought from my Bible study...

2010-03-19T13:01:00.000-07:00

Remember when Isaac calls Esau in and tells him to go out and do some hunting so that he can bless him? Rebekah overhears and says to Jacob, "Look, I overheard your father say to your brother Esau, 'Bring me some game and prepare me some tasty food to eat, so that I may give you my blessing in the presence of the LORD before I die.' Now, my son, listen carefully and do what I tell you: Go out to the flock and bring me two choice young goats, so I can prepare some tasty food for your father, just the way he likes it. Then take it to your father to eat, so that he may give you his blessing before he dies."

This was a complete, boy-you-do-as-I-say thing. It was all her idea. Jacob obeyed, their scheme worked, and then (who knew) Esau found out and was SUPER MAD. He decided to kill his brother, but Rebekah found out about this too, and made yet another plan. She sent for Jacob and said, "Your brother Esau is consoling himself with the thought of killing you. Now then, my son, do what I say: Flee at once to my brother Laban in Haran. Stay with him for a while until your brother's fury subsides. When your brother is no longer angry with you and forgets what you did to him, I'll send word for you to come back from there. Why should I lose both of you in one day?"

Did anybody catch anything funny in that? Who did she put all the blame on? I had never caught this before I did this study, but she put all the blame on Jacob for tricking Isaac! She had probably not even told Isaac it was her fault and apologized--instead she is even tricking herself and writing things off as not her fault when they get tough. I bet if somehow, someway the whole steal-the-blessing operation HAD run cleanly and nobody was furious or anything, she would have taken all the credit. Just a hunch... this girl has a few problems :)

Happy Birthday to my Marchies!!!!!!

2010-03-17T09:57:00.000-07:00

First of all.....LANE TURNED 16!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The best-looking of the Tagg gals is growin up *sniff sniff* Lane and I have been through thick and thin together, and the funny thing is that we've done it all pretty much getting along. We don't remember any downright FIGHTS we've ever had, except when we'd beat each other up trying to get the Barbie we both wanted. I used to could beat her up whenever I liked, but we quit that when we were like, 5 and 7. She'd probably stomp me out now, I'm on my not-so-strong side right now :)

And now.....JAHJAH TURNED 9 TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! No matter how old he gets, he's still my baby. However, he is just now getting too heavy to have on my lap for long periods of time :( He was the first baby that I was really old enough to "baby", so I got really good at changing his diapers and such. He called him "Mwamwah"...a slur of "Meggy". He's in TX right now and I miss him on his birthday especially :( Talked to him this morning on facebook and then on the phone! :D

Last but not least, MY CUZ MACE IS TODAY AN ADULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That boy and I did some wickedly crazy things as kids. What's scary is that it still tends to sneak out of us when we get together :P He would think of the bad idea to begin with, then I would be the brains of how we could carry it out. I miss living in CO and actually being able to see him.

How come we all have to GROW UP? :)

A cool passage, and something to think about if you have a minute

2010-03-12T08:22:00.000-08:00

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God.

~ Romans 8:18-21

This is one pretty passage! Our creation is subjected to pain, wrongdoing, and frustration (kinda like my post below). It's like our world is trapped in a pit. But our hope is to freed and drawn out of the pit, into glorious cleanness and freedom! Praise God that He would call us His children and see fit to save us for no reason!

Also, I've a prayer request. I have this short story in my computer. Tis 4891 words long, and is called, The End Date. The long and short of it is, it is my baby. My favorite thing I have ever written. God really helped me during the writing of it and gave me some great ideas. I think I even cried while I wrote it (doesn't ever happen). Everyone that read it loved it, or said they did, and I thought it was an excellent story.

So I entered it in a Christian short story contest. Paid the entry fee, sent it in, waited patiently for the results. But no emails or phone calls. When I went on the final date to see who the winners were there was no awesome Meggy-written story...it was...a western. Are you kidding me?! And to add insult to injury, the contest people sent me a little book of all the shorts and poems that had won money that year. There was a painful lack of Meggy in that book, I noticed.

So now I'm looking for more contests that maybe will see the value of such a story. But there are problems all over the place. I want a contest that will take my story with it's current wordcount, have a good grand prize, not have an INSANE entry fee (it gets a little nuts), and give my story a shot even though it's Christian. There's always a problem. Good money-winning ones want 1500 words. 5000 worders charge a $50 entry fee. Christian ones want your publishing rights. This list goes on. Also, all contests want previously unpublished work. Say I entered my story somewhere and got like, honorable mention. I'd get like $50 and then it would be published and it would no longer be mine--no making any more money off of it or nuthin. See what I mean? This little fact makes me scared that, when I DO find a good contest, I won't win enough to be worth it. And with secular contests I know that they will be hesitant to publish such decidedly Christian material to their magazine or whatever...so even if I was better than the others, someone else might get picked and I'd have wasted my money to get in.

So, lots of fears and failures. I really want the best for this story and don't want the whole thing to come out a flop. It's probably just my own pride that doesn't want to take honorable mention and lose it's publishing rights. Still praying about what to do with it as I read it over and let others read it.

A Smart Little Guy

2010-03-10T10:03:00.000-08:00

Watch this vid, it won't let me put it up here because this is not facebook... http://news.yahoo.com/video/us-15749625/boy-s-911-call-thwarts-attackers-18549401

Scary huh? Thank the LORD that nobody was hurt and that that kid and the guts to grab his little sister, the phone, and run to hide. Well done little buddy.

It made me think...do our littles know 911? It also made me thankful for our little peephole on the door so we can see who it is before we answer. It doesn't seem like the gunmen wanted to kill anyone, they probably just wanted money or the flatscreen TV. And they would do all that evil to get it. LORD, redeem this fallen world where children have to call 911 to be saved from their neighbors.

Lately I've been in a poetry swing...

2010-03-09T05:56:00.000-08:00

It's actually kinda cool. I'm not sure why this is, but poetry is sometimes a really cool and artistic way of getting a point across to the LORD. I'm not the only one--it worked for David! So anyway, last night I was working on this one, with currently no title...

Lord, you are my defender

From each and every foe.

You've defeated every enemy

That sought to wreak me woe.

But now I see a new tempter,

Her like I'vve never known.

The frightening thing is that her face

Looks just like my own.

True, she has poked at me before,

but she'd been easy to shelf.

She now, somehow, has horrid power--

This version of myself.

She makes me think of awful things,

She dirties me inside.

She makes my hands displease me Lord.

It's her I can't abide.

But my God is bigger than even this monster

And He keeps me in His sight.

I will not be held captive here,

He'll save me by His might.

Lord, set a watch over my tongue,

Allow no ill to exit.

Please stop my deeds from hurting those

Who can't and don't deserve it.

But most of all, please guard my heart,

And keep it as pure as the sea.

Suffer no evil to enter it--

Please save me Lord, from me.

So ladies and gentlemen, I am proof--even if you are no good at poetry, the Lord doesn't mind. I think he likes to hear it. Nobody take this one or anything, though it's probably not good enough for anyone to WANT to take... :)

Going to see a movie today with my dear sista and maybe some friends! :D

The new women's Bible study!

2010-03-08T11:34:00.000-08:00

The women's Bible study at church kicks off tonight! I'm excited. We're going through a book called Loved By God by Liz Curtis Higgs. It is pretty and purple-blue and I have a pen that matches it, so it looks really pretty when I write in it :) This first week, we went over this story in Genesis 27...

When Isaac was old and his eyes were so weak that he could no longer see, he called for Esau his older son and said to him, "My son."

"Here I am," he answered.

Isaac said, "I am now an old man and don't know the day of my death. Now then, get your weapons—your quiver and bow—and go out to the open country to hunt some wild game for me. Prepare me the kind of tasty food I like and bring it to me to eat, so that I may give you my blessing before I die." Now Rebekah was listening as Isaac spoke to his son Esau. When Esau left for the open country to hunt game and bring it back, 6 Rebekah said to her son Jacob, "Look, I overheard your father say to your brother Esau, 'Bring me some game and prepare me some tasty food to eat, so that I may give you my blessing in the presence of the LORD before I die.' Now, my son, listen carefully and do what I tell you: Go out to the flock and bring me two choice young goats, so I can prepare some tasty food for your father, just the way he likes it. Then take it to your father to eat, so that he may give you his blessing before he dies."

Jacob said to Rebekah his mother, "But my brother Esau is a hairy man, and I'm a man with smooth skin. What if my father touches me? I would appear to be tricking him and would bring down a curse on myself rather than a blessing."

His mother said to him, "My son, let the curse fall on me. Just do what I say; go and get them for me."

So he went and got them and brought them to his mother, and she prepared some tasty food, just the way his father liked it. Then Rebekah took the best clothes of Esau her older son, which she had in the house, and put them on her younger son Jacob. She also covered his hands and the smooth part of his neck with the goatskins. Then she handed to her son Jacob the tasty food and the bread she had made.

He went to his father and said, "My father."

"Yes, my son," he answered. "Who is it?"

Jacob said to his father, "I am Esau your firstborn. I have done as you told me. Please sit up and eat some of my game so that you may give me your blessing."

Isaac asked his son, "How did you find it so quickly, my son?"

"The LORD your God gave me success," he replied.

Then Isaac said to Jacob, "Come near so I can touch you, my son, to know whether you really are my son Esau or not."

Jacob went close to his father Isaac, who touched him and said, "The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau." He did not recognize him, for his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau; so he blessed him. "Are you really my son Esau?" he asked.

"I am," he replied.

Then he said, "My son, bring me some of your game to eat, so that I may give you my blessing."

Jacob brought it to him and he ate; and he brought some wine and he drank. 26 Then his father Isaac said to him, "Come here, my son, and kiss me."

So he went to him and kissed him. When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said,

"Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the LORD has blessed. May God give you of heaven's dew and of earth's richness—an abundance of grain and new wine. May nations serve you and peoples bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers, and may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed and those who bless you be blessed."

We dug into each of the characters in this story in depth. One thing I especially noticed looking into it--Rebekah tried to "help God out" by being deceitful and tricking her husband. Well, the LORD doesn't NEED any help from you madam, and you definetly don't need to SIN in order to assist him. And look back up at Jacob's only problem with his mom's plan. Astounding! I had never noticed that he never brought up the elementary question, "Mom, are you sure we're doing the right thing?" That boy was pretty much all in!

Tonight there is a group discussion and a video on it! Happyhappy!

The one that made me smile this morning

2010-03-05T07:15:00.000-08:00

"This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all." ~ 1 John 1:5

Something about hearing this one on the radio when you're just waking up and light is peeking through the blinds is just awesome. Our God is LIGHT! The very nature of light. Before anything existed, He said...

"Let there be LIGHT!"

And there was.

And there is no darkness at all in our God. God cannot go against His nature--He cannot ever contain any darkness! We never have to worry about darkness or grief coming from Him.

I would like to take this moment to say...

2010-03-04T09:46:00.000-08:00

The last couple days have been spent interviewing several of my big sister friends to put some more mustard in my book. The answers have been great and I appreciate all you girls! (Though you probably don't read this blog :P)

But the beginning of this project has showed me how woefully short I come from being the awesome, Christlike, confidante sissy I want to be. It also made me think of my adopted big sissy and all she is to me. So that's what I want to talk a lil bit about...

I have known my big sissy Bekah for about... 14 years now. We've been good friends with their family for just about as far back as I can remember. I held every sibling of hers that came after her...and her mother was even at the birth of many siblings of mine that came after me! We've come a long way and done so much together. We've talked about every book in creation from the time we were little to now. Most of my articles of clothing came from her while I was growing up. Then I moved to CO and left her here to deal with everybody. She did excellently, calling me and telling me about everything that was going on. Then I came back, and we've been closer than ever. We have lots of friends we're close to, but we two have stuck together even when other people got weird, grew up without us, or did something that made us sad. We share our griefs and victories. She keeps me focused on the Word, and snaps me out of it if ever she senses I'm losing concentration. She messages me just about every day. If she knows I'm sad (if I am, she pretty much knows) she makes sure to check on me extra. She calls me even though we live in the same state now, just randomly. She is always there to listen, and if there was ever an emergency when I needed her, she'd drop everything and come (I found that out a weird and funny way...she was kinda mad for a second :P). She's just like a big sister (or so I assume, since she's the only one I've ever had) and I can tell her anything without it being weird. She understands, even through my bad communication skills...she's used to it...

That's the kind of big sissy I want to be to the girls (Lane and Lou) who are closer to my age. I want them to be able to talk to me about anything they wish and to be a true friend to them.

LORD raise up an awesome big sissy in me and in all the world!

Our world is emptier than we know

2010-03-03T10:30:00.000-08:00

Every bit of matter on earth is made up of atoms--the smallest particle of any element. EVERYTHING you can see and even stuff you can't is made up of these guys. They behave differently, making up different things, etc. But there is no escaping that atoms make up our whole world--everything we know.

But here is something very interesting to note. See the picture. Atoms are made up of a nucleus and tiny particles and electrons. Nobody is quite sure of theire precise looks because they are so tiny. But we do know that most of the atom is empty space.

Think of that! The Creator of the universe used these tiny building blocks to build earth...but it is mostly empty space.

This is just interesting to me.

All the Blessings of Life

2010-03-01T12:04:00.000-08:00

I got this book for my Christmas :D It is called, All the Blessings of Life: The Best Stories of F.W. Boreham. Not too deep, never that shallow, always random, it is a buch of little snippets from his books and journals and such, just about a couple paragraphs each usually. This fact makes it the best book to have on the back of the toilet EVER. It gives you something to think about, but not TOO much to where you'd rather not have to mentally shovel through it just at that moment in the bathroom. Very good so far :D

The bit I read today was a little longer. It talked about a clean conscience and how it relates to sleep. Quite amusingly interesting. Boreham talked about the book Les Miserables, where Jean Valjean was robbing the good bishop whose house he was staying at. As he was creeping around and about to leave, he spotted the bishop sleeping. He quoted the book as saying, "The moral world has no greater spectacle than this, a troubled, restless conscience, which is on the point of commiting a bad action, contemplating the sleep of a just man". Then he talked about a scene in English history, when the Earl of Argyle was about to be executed. One of the traitor lords came up to the prison and asked to see his lordship. The man was sleeping peacefully, as if he didn't mind that he was going to be killed at all. The conscience of the traitor smote him and he ran out home to his family, saying, "I have been to Argyle's prison. I have seen him, within an hour of eternity, sleeping as sweetly as ever a man did! But as for me..."

Boreham wraps up his thought by saying, "(the church) has excelled in the production of heroic and magnificent sleepers. That is why I insist that every candidate for her membership should be searchingly questioned as to his ability to sleep."

Heeheehee! I found this interesting :)

Who Will You Be?

2010-02-26T09:00:00.000-08:00

What do you want people to think when they think of you?

Will they think of the shabby stinky one who doesn't really care about them or what they're talking about? The lazy one with no aspiration?

Yesterday at the science fair I saw a kid that I'd seen only a couple of times before. He's somewhere in the 13-15 age group I think. Nothing special about him just by looking at him--average height, average weight, jeans and a mountain dew tee shirt...pretty normal kid. I didn't give him a second thought. Well, I was holding Bird's hand by Lane and Moose's display, and this kid holds out a bowl of popcorn to the Bird (part of his own display). "You want some popcorn?" he asks the Bird in a friendly sort of way. She had a bite and smiled all sweet and stuff, and he grinned and put the bowl back. I kinda tend to like people who are nice to my littles, so now this kid was now not just a kid--he was a nice kid.

But he was not done being a nice kid after that! I was in charge of lunch and drinks for everybody, and many of the kids would mutter, "ummmm....root beer please" when I asked them a question. But this guy came away from his display board a couple of times to the lunch room to help I assume his little sister get some pizza. He looked me in the eye and was nice and loud with his drink choice and said thank you. He and some other kids helped us clean up chairs afterward and I heard him call my Bird by her NAME. He must have heard one of us say it or something and remembered it. I was pretty impressed and I mentioned it in the car. J-dude said, "Oh, the kid with the green shirt? Yeah, he was nice, he helped me with my drink. The juice jug was REALLY full, so he poured it for me." K, so NOW I really like this kid, right? He presented himself very impressively and gave me reason to think well of him when I didn't even know him. That's the kind of impression I'm after when I'm with people--even if I don't know them!

But there's more to being impressive than just how you appear. It's also what you think about. What your dreams are. I've met boys who didn't really care about what they were going to be when they grew up, even if grown-updom was knocking at the door. They didn't have anything they cared about doing, and weren't even after any money really. No drive or hardworkingness. Girls do the same thing. Even if you are a girl who is not career-minded at all or doesn't need money, if you're not practicing to be a wife and mom one day than you are wasting your living time.

We are supposed to be people who accomplish things and do good to others in our occupations, as a witness to Christ. Let's be alert and think about such things!

Come to the talent show tonight, one and all! :D

Samuels

2010-02-24T13:16:00.000-08:00

I was reminded the other day that I love 1st and 2nd Samuel and I haven't read them in a long while. So, I have started them again!

It all starts out with Samuel the prophet. His mum prayed for him, God gave her her wish, Samuel went to live in the temple to serve with Eli the priest, etc.

But during all this, Israel is at war with the Philistines. So the Israelites went out one day to fight the Philistines one day. They were expecting to win, but they were defeated and lost four thousand men to Philistine swords. So the elders of Israel (as in the wise, decision-making people) said to each other, "Why did the LORD bring defeat upon us today before the Philistines? Let us bring the ark of the LORD's covenant from Shiloh, so that it may go with us and save us from the hand of our enemies."

So that IT may save us. IT. Not the LORD. They were treating the ark as like... "the Ring of Power" of something--some magic object that would save them. They didn't even take it as a SYMBOL of God's power and covenant. That wouldn't have been right either, but it makes more sense than "the Magic Ark". This sounds like the same thing using the LORD's name in vain to me.

Then what happened? It said the slaughter was great and the ark (that could not do a thing about it) was captured. 30,000 men died, and every other man fled to his tent.

The latest thing I'm praying about...

2010-02-23T20:41:00.000-08:00

My mom and some ladies of our church were talking about different parenting books the other night. There are a great many, as we all know. I was just listening and thinking, maybe I should read a parenting book. I'm not a parent, but I work with kids in babysitting and with my own sibs. But then I thought maybe a parenting book still wouldn't be quite right for such a job as mine. I made an aloud wonder about the fact that there are a great many "parenting" books, but no "big sissying" books. This was met with the response. "You should write it! That would be perfect and it would sell!"

Hmmmm...would it? One part of me says I don't know if it's something I could do. I'm sure there are much better big sissys than me that should be doing it. I'm positive. But the other part of me says, those ones aren't doing it. And God has given me the most diverse set of little siblings to ever stick in one family. I have...

A quirky and gorgeous one who's always good for a story

A studly and goofy one in between kid and man

A flibbertygibbet who can think and do cool things

A quiet and loud at the same time one

One that just wants to have fun

A strange, surprising, cocky, and cute one

A precious baby girl with some bite

and

A small and serious one with a large vocabulary

The biggest thing I've learned with having eight, very different little sibs is how to generally get along with everybody. Living with such different personalities all the time I think has really helped me not just learn to get along with them, but with other different personalities outside the home.

I may just have to figure out how to transfer that from this thought, to like a big sissy study. If I did this thing I'd certainly need some help from my big sissy friends! Not to mention I have an adopted big sissy who's purty special to go off of a bit as well.

Just something I'm praying about...

Stomach Bug >:\

2010-02-22T20:54:00.000-08:00

Does anyone have any idea how looooooooooooooooooog it takes for a stomach bug to trickle through an 11 person family?!?!? VERY frustratitating, especially when victim for some strange reason unbeknownst to me can't make it to the toilet. I may find out why this could be one day, but for now it is a mystery. LORD, send the stomach bug out so that none of our others have to have it! The way I've done the math, we're only about halfway through this thing. But these kids have LIVES to live! This stomach bug must not bring Taggs to a halt!

One thing comes to mind in this situation...let's all sing it together...

"Oh, God is bigger than the stomach bug!

He's bigger than a virus, or the germs that threaten me,

Oh, God is bigger than the stomach bug!

And He's watchin' out for you and me!

Watchin'...

Watchiiiiiiinnnnnnnn'...

Out for you and MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

Yeah!

One of those things that I would love to hear an insight about...

2010-02-19T14:44:00.000-08:00

But even the archangel Michael, when he was disputing with the devil about the body of Moses, did not dare to bring a slanderous accusation against him, but said, "The Lord rebuke you!" ~ Jude 1:9

WHAT is going on here? What about the body of Moses? Why did the devil or the angel care? And especially how did Jude know about this? I would love it if there was some record of the fights that go on in the eternity realm...but what went on here?

Twas a nice, ripstickingful day what was warm today! :D

Show and Tell

2010-02-18T21:17:00.000-08:00

Today I was prepping for teaching my co-op class. Today my boys were going to learn how to "show" things in their writing, not just "tell" them.

Example:

"Paul was very angry when he came into his room"

as opposed to:

"Paul's face turned beet red with rage as he stormed into his room, muttering evil things and kicking the furnature."

The first tells you about it. Very clearly and concisely. But you can't really understand exactly what happened until you read the one that SHOWS you about it.

So I'm getting all the prints and activities loaded up for class and I'm thinking about how this relates to sharing our faith. We can TELL about the love of Christ till our teeth fall out. But if we do not SHOW it--if it does not shine through us, how are people really to understand? That's something to admire about the disciples when they were telling their friends about Jesus after they had first met him. Their main line was, "Come and see!" They knew they couldn't fully tell about how amazing Jesus was. They didn't flounder for words or argue about how many good things possible could come out of Nazareth. They were ready to SHOW them their new master. Sometimes just words don't do it. Letting God's love show is what really counts. Has anyone ever noticed that our God is really really hard to try to describe? :)

Left Behind?

2010-02-17T08:13:00.000-08:00

"I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book. And if anyone takes words away from this book of prophecy, God will take away from him his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book."

~ Revelation 22:18-19

A curious thought occured to me when I read this last night. I thought of the Left Behind book series, which is a fictional account of the second coming and all the things that happen in Revelation. I wonder what exactly John means by adding and taking words away. I'm pretty sure the authors of the LB books were not right about a whole bunch of stuff. As fiction authors, they added this and weren't sure about that. But then it is only meant to be fiction. Though I wonder if making fiction of it is taking the prophecy too lightly.

Any thoughts?

A Real Pastor

2010-02-16T08:16:00.000-08:00

Anybody ever had a pastor? Probably. But do you have one that goes beyond Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights, who prays for you specifically and makes sure to check up on your life periodically? Maybe. But do you have one that still continues to be your pastor and do those things AFTER you've moved sixteen hours away and have another church and are technically under another pastor? Eh, no. You sure don't. That would just be ME.

Who knew when we walked into AHBC that it would mean this grand new thing called a pastor would happen? I'd had...I guess three real churches I remember clearly. I had enjoyed them all! The pastors were friendly and one in particular was a downright amazing teacher. I didn't really know any of them as a person, however. I didn't really know that it was possible to be able to go to one of them after the service and talk about what parts of the sermon eluded me or even how school was treating me or why the Colts were going to beat the Chargers. But in Alameda Hills, that is very possible. I'm not even sure how it happened that I was able to tell this pastor everything these things that God was doing in my life. He just made it his business to know what was up. I learned that even the things that were close to me that I wasn't that comfortable talking about were ok to communicate. After all, if he didn't know things how could he help or give ideas? Kinda like my mom and dad--they purty much know everything and sometimes it's good just that they know, and not even have any way to fix it at all. To an extent, it's the same deal with my pastor. I soon warmed up to sharing life's weirdities and hearing his always good input. He's always good for some teaching, advising, encouraging, correcting, and just to poke some fun.

I think this is what God meant the pastor of a church to be. Jesus did the same thing. He spent an awful lot of time talking to people. He was a teacher, a healer, a friend, a brother, all kinds of things. He talked to the people who didn't matter--Samaritan women, beggars, demon-possesed outcasts, and even lepers. In the same way, a good pastor is not just a teacher, but someone who takes an interest in the people of his congregation and is there for them if they need somebody. All that to say, I have a pastor like that. I can keep up with his teaching online, he emails little tidbits that make me smile, and he calls me when he suspects trouble, all in his work for Christ. I thank the LORD for pastors like that, and especially mine. Love you Les!

My Favorite Skillet Song

2010-02-10T07:19:00.000-08:00

Skillet ~ Rest

Still, soft quietly spoken voice

That persistently calls my name

And quickens my heart to come

And I come

And I rest in the shelter of Your love

And I rest in the wonder of Your grace

And I rest in the shelter of Your love

And I rest in the wonder of You

Embraced in the promise of You

Is rest for the weary soul

Releasing all that is mine

I reach for You

Take all the old and You make it new

Eveything I give to You

You're the hope that can pull me through

Hallelujah

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

~ Matthew 11:28

Isn't amazing that our God can be run to as an escape from everything?

Too close of a call

2010-02-07T21:16:00.000-08:00

Tonight while I was grieving the loss of the Superbowl, my friend Andrew and my aquaintance Chris were out driving. They missed a curve and their car flipped 2 1/2 times. Chris (the driver) was thrown from the car before the driver's seat was completely crushed. Andrew was still in the car and took a hit to the head, some bruised ribs, and some shock, but was able to call for help. I found all this out on fb and few really knew any details while I worried myself crazy while important people figured out what happened. Finally I ascertained that Chris is in the ER with broken ribs and other forms of very banged upedness, but they don't think there is any other damage. Andrew was released from the hospital and got to go home, and then got on facebook--a HUGE woosh of relief for me.

The entire thought and the unexpectedness of it all just made me sick. Amazing how the LORD protected them and kept them as safe as He did. This whole thing reminded me how quickly things change and how much I take for granted--even the things I love like my family, my own ability to breathe, and the tall, spiky-haired, elvish-looking indivdual who enjoys picking a fight with me. Thank you God for protecting Andrew and for again showing me how all-powerful you are. AND for reminding me that I need to show my appreciation for the people you give me in life, before it's too late for either me or them. Thank you for sparing me my friend, and continue to show your blessing and healing to Chris who is still in the hospital.

It reminds me of a song...

LIVE LIKE WE'RE DYING

by Kris Allen

Sometimes we fall down and can't get back up

we're hiding behind skin that's too tough

how come we don't say I love you enough

till it's too late, it's not too late

Our hearts are hungry for a food that won't come

we could make a feast from these crumbs

and we're all staring down the barrel of a gun

so if your life flashed before you

what would you wish you would've done

Yeah... gotta start

lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here

this is all we got and we gotta start pickin it

every second counts on a clock that's tickin'

gotta live like we're dying

We only got

86 400 seconds in a day to

turn it all around or throw it all away

we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em

while we got the chance to say

gotta live like we're dying

And if your plane fell out of the skies

who would you call with your last goodbyes

should be so careful who we live out our lives

so when we long for absolution

there'll no one on the line

Yeah... gotta start

lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here

this is all we got and we gotta start pickin it

every second counts on a clock that's tickin'

gotta live like we're dying

We only got

86 400 seconds in a day to

turn it all around or throw it all away

we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em

while we got the chance to say

gotta live like we're dying

Person reading this, I love you! Come see me so I can tell you so.

There is no one better to trust than our God!

2010-02-03T09:13:00.000-08:00

If there is one thing I have learned in 18 years, it is that the LORD's plan is always the best plan.
I have learned that He will work everything out for me in the best way without making mistakes.
I love to be able to trust Him with every little thing that may come up in life.
And even when I don't understand His reasoning, I love that I can know it's a GOOD reasoning that won't ever fall through.
He brings special people and circumstances into life at just the right time, and helps me know what to do with them.
He's the kind of God that you can approach about ANYTHING. There aren't many humans that you can just talk to about ANYTHING. But with God, you can whine to at the end of the day about how you can't find your favorite lip gloss, praise about the beautiful day, and beg to forgive you after you've done something that displeased him. He listens to all of it as if He has nothing else to do.
He likes to make things a little interesting. His irony can make you laugh any day.
No matter what anyone else thinks of you, you are His child that he loves unconditionally.

So, with the bare bones of advantages up there alone, it would seem that God would be one we can trust--the one who will never leave us out to dry, even if everyone else deserts us.

"It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man." ~ Psalm 118:8

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, and whose hope is the LORD." ~ Jeremiah 17:7

"...the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace and glory...O Lord of hosts, blessed is the man who trusts in You!" ~ Psalm 84:11-12
"Preserve me, O God, for in You I put my trust." ~ Psalm 16:1

"Behold, God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid." ~ Isaiah 12:2
"I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I will call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised; So shall I be saved from my enemies." ~ Psalm 18:1-3
"Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. For our heart shall rejoice in Him, because we have trusted in His holy name." ~ Psalm 33:20-21

When chatting to the LORD about the weather ain't small talk :)

2010-01-28T13:26:00.000-08:00

Dear LORD, there are a ton of cool things going on this weekend--the kind of cool things that require good weather. But the Arkansas forecast is icy and cold and decidedly UNcooperative. Please tell the ice and rain and cold to be still and head off, just like You did when the storms were not friendly towards You and your disciples. Even the ice and the rain obey You! :D

Lahdeedaaaah....

2010-01-27T13:57:00.000-08:00

For some reason today I haven't been able to focus very well...it's a wonder I got school done! I woke up late today after that certain sleep like you sleep when you're sick. Don't think I'm sick though! We've got the feast tonight, and we Tagggirlz made some plans afterward to have a date in our room and watch some of a new version of a Jane Austen (girly) movie. Hey that "Tagggirlz" looks kinda cool! :D Then I think I'll do some of the One True God study by Paul Washer and make sure to write things down and have some deep thought time. On that thought, the latest from that study.....

Washer is now focusing on the Self-Existence of God. In Exodus 3:14 God told Moses, "I AM that I AM". According to Washer this... "demonstrates that God's existence was not caused, nor does it depend on anything...outside of Himself. It is God's nature to exist, and so he simply IS--without effort." It's like the question, "When did God first begin?" He ALWAYS was, though we can't understand that.

Acts 17:24-25 ~ "The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else."

This verse is Paul telling the men of Athens about the true God who was unknown to them. God needs nothing--another verse somewhere told the Israelites that they should not think they are doing what God needs done by offering sacrifices. He doesn't NEED sheep and oxen--He doesn't eat them. He NEEDS nothing! He is, just because of Himself

Driving!

2010-01-25T08:54:00.000-08:00

I'm going to take the drivers test today!!!!! I think I have to take the written test and then wait 30 days to take the actual driving driving test. Pray for me people! This whole driving thing should be a good time, right? :)

"It's still that simple"

2010-01-22T06:41:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I watched a Love Comes Softly movie and a girl was whining about everything being complicated and her grandma said something like, "Don't you wish it was just like when you were a child--you could pray to God and then leave it, fully trusting in him?"

"Yes!"

"It's still that simple."

Well of course it is! You know what really confuses me? I can NOT figure out why I ALWAYS forget that I can leave a matter to the LORD and not have to worry about it anymore or try to fix it! Besides just the forgetting part, you'd think I'd remember because my own ways of trying to fix things or make them better just don't work. I have a God who will take care of things while I just be still and trust him--and I forget?

1 John 5:14-15 ~ "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him."

Who knew it could be hard?

2010-01-21T10:53:00.000-08:00

Isn't it safer to simply keep the heart locked up and barricaded completely?

To run the delicate romantic situations with one's head?

'Course I just love the dude friends in my life.

I'm proud to know some amazing, funny, talented, Christian, good-looking young men.

But why do we all have to grow up and let things get awkward and...FEELY?

Can't we all just stay friends like we were when we were ten?

I'd honestly rather, and not have to think about anybody THAT WAY.

Unless, of course, he was the real One.

Hopefully the LORD would tell me that without waiting around.

But if you are not the real One and you're interested in me...

I probably like you as a good friend something fierce.

But I hope you know I'd rather be friends the way we always have been.

That would be the hard part--if you felt that way, and you weren't the One, but you were a good friend of mine.

Then it would my job to shovel a trench between us, one that never needed to be there before.

I'd do the shovel work while being just torn up inside because I couldn't just be your friend like always.

I would dig.

I'd like you too much not to dig.

I wouldn't let you get into a relationship that I knew wouldn't work in the long run.

I'd feel bad you felt the way you did for your sake and do anything to make it go away.

I'd feel bad for my own sake, because things could never be the same as the short time ago when we were all children.

And you would not have a clue why I was digging trenches.

You would probably feel really hurt over it.

And that would make me cry a lot.

Even the using-head-only-Meggy would feel awful that you were sad.

So I'd pray for God to tell you that we just weren't right.

So you could be the one to tell me.

And then we could just be friends and that's all.

It would save me some pain and digging.

And maybe both of us some hurt.

Ya know?

Just thought I'd say.. in case anything ever happened that that way.

In short, "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax!!!!!!!!! Help me!!!!!!!!!!! I'm.................

FEELING!!!!!!"

Christ Works in ME

2010-01-20T12:53:00.000-08:00

Philippians 2:13 ~ "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose."

This verse really got my attention this time around. I know I've read it a million times, but this time I sat and stared at it for like 5 minutes. It dawned on me that my simply WANTING to do God's will is, well, God working! Of course it is Him working when I actually DO His will. But now it smashed me in the head that I cannot will to fulfill God's purposes unless it is Him working in me! If God is not working in somebody, that person cannot wish to do the will of God.

An encouraging thought, is it not?

Haiti

2010-01-18T14:43:00.000-08:00

We've all heard about it--seen all the headlines. The Haiti earthquake disaster. At least 50,000 people dead Many are more are injured, many are homeless, and all are effected. But I read a cool little blurb...

"During the days following the the earthquake, hundreds of women were seen marching through the streets in peaceful processions, singing and clapping. On Sunday, 17 January, Haitians roamed the streets looking for church services to attend. Impromptu gatherings were held outside churches that had collapsed with a few attendees appearing in their best clothes."

It's easy (for me at least) to think that this doesn't effect me since after all, it didn't happen in the US or directly effect anyone I know. But can you even imagine how the people that were directly effected feel? People are STILL dying from being trapped under rubble and buildings. These are God's children, and it's selfish and sinful for us not to be concerned.

Pray hard my friends!

Study with Bekah

2010-01-13T09:23:00.000-08:00

Bekah and I have been doing a Bible study off of the book ONE TRUE GOD by Paul Washer. You can buy it in hard copy, but there is a PDF online too. Bekah and I had our first meeting this morning at 8 on chat. We spent about an hour reading a section and discussing each verse.

Today's section had a few verses on what God CANNOT do. We say God can do everything, but He cannot go against Himself.

He cannot sin.

He cannot lie to us.

He cannot tempt us.

We spent a little longer talking about that last one. It doesn't sound as outlandish to say "God is tempting me" than "God lied to me" or something.

"When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone" ~ James 1:13

We talked about temptation. If God cannot be tempted by evil, imagine what a new experience it was for Jesus to be tempted by Satan in the wilderness! All a part of Him being human--part of the way He loved us. The next verse says that temtation happens when we lose sight of God and are "dragged away and enticed by our own evil desires". God has NOTHING to do with that! Just the opposite--it is all our flesh and Satan. God is merely the One who waits for us to run back to Him. He gives us that place to flee temptation...Himself!

A Day For Rejoicing

2010-01-12T08:51:00.000-08:00

Nehemiah and the Israelites have just finished rebuilding the wall. They experienced all kinds of hostility and opposition, but God was with them and helped them complete the wall in only 52 days. After this, the people all gathered together as one to hear Ezra read the Book of the Law. They listened attentively and bowed down, worshiped, and wept as they listened.

Then Nehemiah the governor, Ezra the priest and scribe, and the Levites who were instructing the people said to them all, "This day is sacred to the LORD your God. Do not mourn or weep." For all the people had been weeping as they listened to the words of the Law. Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."

The Levites calmed all the people, saying, "Be still, for this is a sacred day. Do not grieve."

Then all the people went away to eat and drink, to send portions of food and to celebrate with great joy, because they now understood the words that had been made known to them.

These people knew that they had fallen woefully short of what God's law required. They had been in exile a long time and could not worship God as they used to in a foreign land. But God did not want them to weep over the past--God wanted them to be joyous! This was a special day! The law was now understood by them--why not make it a party, said the LORD!

I just thought that was neat. Some people say Christians are always a bored species, wearing stiff collars and never smiling because of the sin in the world. There is a time for mourning, but there is also a time when God calls us to rejoice!

18! Whoa.

2010-01-07T08:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was my birfday!!! I am now a DOLT! :P This will be a weird year...I'll be driving by myself, teaching a co-op class, graduating high school, going to college, and who knows all what else. With all that, a bunch of good stuff can happen, and a bunch of bad stuff could happen. Thank heaven we have a God who keeps an eye on these kinds of things!

Here's a list of some stuff that happened while I was 17...

We moved back to AR
I left my CO friends, but still keep up with them, and I was reunited with my old friends
I made significant new friends
I learned to drive in traffic regularly
I started marking papers for friends
I found out I loved to teach
My Pawpaw got cancer
I read through the Bible in 90 days
I started writing a book that could really be good
We left our CO church and found a new one
We had a couple of family losses
I found the haircut that works for me
Got my ears pierced, and Mom and Dad gave me GORGEMOUS diamond earrings that I love
The first black president in US history was elected
Michael Jackson died
Everybody freaked out over the Swine Flu
There was a heroic emergency plane landing on the Hudson
The Colts broke the NFL all-time win streak record

Hmmm... anything else?

Scholarshipping

2010-01-05T07:54:00.000-08:00

Look at that word up there, it's so WEIRD looking. So is the actually thing it implies. Yesterday I spent a long time checking out scholarships and writing essays to apply for them. I read a fitting verse for the subject...

"The Teacher searched to find just the right words, and what he wrote was upright and true."

~Ecclesiastes 12:10

That's exactly what I'm going for--to search for just the right words and write what is upright and true. Hopefully it will get me some school money to be a teacher :) If yall could put some prayers into my word choices it would be much appreciated ;)

Oh, and a side note. The other night I was reading my Bible and the Bird was asleep in her bed. She starts to whimper and roll around, kinda waking up Usually I just freeze and wait for her to go back to sleep, but that night I felt like I should climb over to her bed and tell her to go back to sleep. That's when I notice a rubberband wrapped REALLY tight around her finger, which was starting to turn reddish-purple. Whew! I said a thanks to Jesus for telling me to fix it, and gave the already-asleep Bird a speech on what is a beautiful ring and what is decidedly not.

Blessed Are Those Who Mourn

2009-12-30T08:55:00.000-08:00

I am reading a book what I got for Christmas--The Heavenly Octave by F.W. Boreham. It is a study of the Beatitudes, and he has some excellent thoughts. Last night I read what he had to say about "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted".

He said he knew of three different ways to take it. The first is to go to a happy young soul who is joyous and praising God and say with a wagging finger, "blessed are those who mourn, young lady!" It would seem quite confusing and foreign.
Another way is to go to some bitter person whose family is all gone and who's been in prison being tortured their whole life. If you say, "blessed are those who mourn" to them, it will seem to be almost belittling or mocking their situation.
Boreham says that those who Jesus says are blessed are those who have know both joy and loss--when the calm has come afterward. "The eyes, cleansed by weeping, have obtained a clearer vision of life's profound mystery and beneficent discipline. The subject of this third picture knows the secret of the mourner's blessedness."

I thought THAT there was an excellent way to put it.

The Odds of a Man Being Able to Fulfill Old Testament Prophecies

2009-12-29T07:44:00.000-08:00

From http://www.chirstfirsttaekwondo.blogspot.com/...

What are the mathematical odds?

The probability of 8 Old Testament prophecies being fulfilled in a man is 10 to the power of 17. 100,000,000,000,000,000.

To illustrate this number take 100 quadrillion silver dollars and spread them over the state of Texas. This will cover the entire state with sliver dollars two feet deep. Mark one silver dollar red and fly over the middle of the state and drop it. Blind fold a man and tell him walk as far as he wants into the state, stop, and pick up one silver dollar. The chance of him picking up that one red colored silver dollar is one in 100,000,000,000,000,000. This is the probability of only 8 of the OT prophecies being fulfilled about Jesus, yet there were 61 major OT prophecies fulfilled in His lifetime.

Walking With the LORD

2009-12-28T08:52:00.000-08:00

It has recently been brought to my attention through several different people, events, circumstances, etc. that, well, walking with God is the best thing ever.

Of course I already knew walking with God was basically the epitome of Christianity--if you are a child of God, you walk in His steps. But just recently the full magnitude of what it means to be in the LORD has hit me like never before. If you are truly in Christ, you are constantly checking with Him. Your decisions are all based off of what He wants. In fact, the only thing you want is to do what He wants! It is very liberating to just throw everything over to a God who loves you. I can't figure out why I continue to think things will be better if I worry over my little problems myself. When the little things are in God's hands, they don't seem like such a big deal after all.

And the best thing about being in the center of God's will? You can't mess up! Whoa! Obviously it's not a "Oh, I got in God's will and now I can do whatever and nothing go wrong" thing. It reminds me of the Ultimate Balance Test on Wii Fit. On said test, you must stand on the board and keep your center of balance at 50/50 for 3 seconds. HARD man! As soon as you're in, you're out! You have to chase it down, to keep figuring out how to get in there and keep it there. It's the same way with walking in God's will. You can't do any one thing and be "in the club". It's a constant process. Most of the time walking WITH God means quite a bit of time running BEHIND God, yelling, "Hey, wait up!" :P

But you know what's awesome about staying in God's will and walking with Him? It's fun most of the time, at least for me. The more I study and read and pray, the more I know about the characteristics of my Savior and all the different things He likes. And THAT is cool stuff.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!

2009-12-25T13:13:00.000-08:00

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins."

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: "The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel"—which means, "God with us."

When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

~ Matthew 1:18-25

And with this Christmas wish is missed

The point I could convey

If only I could find the words to say to let You know how much You've touched my life

Because here is where You're finding me, in the exact same place as New Year's eve

And from a lack of my persistency

We're less than half as close as I want to be

And the first time

That You opened Your eyes did You realize that You would be my Savior

And the first breath that left Your lips

Did You know that it would change this world forever

And so this Christmas I'll compare the things I felt in prior years

To what this midnight made so clear

That You have come to meet me here

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

In the hope that what You did

That you were born so I might live

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

And I, I celebrate the day

That You were born to die

So I could one day pray for You to save my life

Pray for You to save my life....

Pray for You to save my life

~ "I Celebrate the Day" by Relient K

The song that makes me fall in love with Jesus again every time I listen to it

2009-12-21T14:55:00.000-08:00

Chris Rice ~ Prone to Wander

On the surface not a ripple

Undercurrent wages war

Quiet in the sanctuary

Sin is crouching at my door

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

I wake to find my soul in fragments

Given to a thousand loves

But only One will have no rival

Hangs to heal me, spills His blood

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

Curse-reversing Day of Jesus

When You finally seize my soul

Freedom from myself will be

The sweetest rest I've ever known

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

The state of the heart when you come before the LORD

2009-12-16T19:05:00.000-08:00

My heart is not proud, O LORD,

my eyes are not haughty;

I do not concern myself with great matters

or things too wonderful for me.

But I have stilled and quieted my soul;

like a weaned child with its mother,

like a weaned child is my soul within me.

~ Psalm 131

What is this but the perfect soil for the LORD to plant in? The thing about a weaned child is that it doesn't know where its food is going to come from. I mean the food used to be just RIGHT THERE, but now he has to trust completely that his parents will bring his food from a source unbeknownst to him.

Exactly the state we are in with our Father.

Stories

2009-12-15T16:51:00.000-08:00

Today Stuart McAllister, one of RZIM's speakers, was on at apologetics. He spoke more wonderfully than usual of Ravi Zecharias. I used to wonder if the littler evangelists knew what it was about the great evangelists that made them excellent speakers. Now I know that they know :)

One of the things he mentioned about Dr. Ravi was that he uses stories perfectly. It's true--he always has a story and it ties in perfectly to what he's saying, and he can explain his whole point with that one story. It's really amazing--it makes him easy to understand, and you can see how the point applies to real life just because he told the story.

Stories are amazing things. Dr. McAllister talked about movies, and what great conversation they are, and about WHY they are such great conversation starters. It is because the story is usually one of hope. He used Finding Nemo as an example. It's not just a story about fish. The son gets taken away, and the dad goes off and braves the ocean to find his son, and all kinds of things happen, and OH WE'RE GONNA DIE, and then..........they're reunited and live happily ever after. WHY do we love stories like that? WHY do stories work as such openers, hooks, and attention grabbers? Dr. McAllister says, "The stories we love only work because there's a primal story from which they draw their power".

"If we take the imagery of Scripture seriously, if we believe that God will one day give us the Morning Star and cause us to put on the splendor of the sun, then we may surmise that both the ancient myths and the modern poetry, so false as history, may be very near the truth as prophecy. At present we are on the outside of the world, the wrong side of the door. We discern the freshness and purity of morning, but they do not make us fresh and pure. We cannot mingle with the splendors we see. But all the leaves of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so. Someday, God willing, we shall get in."

~C.S. Lewis

We need to see THROUGH beauty to what beauty points to.

The latest excellent verse

2009-12-14T06:10:00.000-08:00

"It is the LORD your God you must follow, and him you must revere. Keep his commands and obey him; serve him and hold fast to him."

~ Deuteronomy 13:4

This about sums it up. This verse is our life--it covers everything. It sounds so easy doesn't it? This verse is what I want to do for the rest of my days on earth. Even if I never become a famous writer, or the best wife and mama in the world, or the smartest English teacher ever, I will die happy if I will have followed this verse. If I have done what God wants, then nothing else matters. At all.

Neither

2009-12-10T08:06:00.000-08:00

Remember when Joshua and the Israelites were FINALLY getting to go into the promised land? They'd crossed through the Jordan river on dry land, eaten some of the fruit of the land, and are getting pretty excited. But the bad guys that they were scared of in the first place are still out there. They need to be defeated. So on this particular day, Joshua was standing near Jericho. It was the first place to go. I'm sure he was kinda counting fighting men in his mind, thinking up tentative schemes on how to get over those walls and defeat those people. But then he looks up and sees a man with a drawn sword in front of him. Had to be a wee bit disturbing. He asked the man, "Are you for us or for our enemies?"

Listen to what the answer was! "Neither, but as commander of the army of the LORD I have now come."

Now we all know that the man proceeded to give directions about how to march around Jericho and the walls would fall down, etc. But what really grabbed me this time was that the man said, "Neither". He said he wasn't on the side of Joshua, or of Jericho! It seems he would say, "your side", especially when he was there just to give specific directions on how to defeat Jericho. Anybody agree?

And now here is my thinking. My simple guess is that Joshua NEVER thought, "Hey, hows about we march around these walls blowing trumpets for seven days these certain number of times, and the walls will fall down and we win!" My guess is that he was shopping around for grappling hooks or big ladders or bombs or whatever would come in handy. He was making his own plan. But whatever he was thinking, it is safe to assume that his plan was NOT what God's plan was. So God was basically saying, "I'm not for your plan, or their plan--check out MY plan for YOU!"

These are just my thoughts of the last 20 hours or so. Don't know if I communicated them to make any sense or not.

But God's plan always prevails. Bring it LORD! Not my plan, but yours be done!

A song my daddy wrote that nobody's allowed to steal under pain of jailhood

2009-12-09T13:26:00.000-08:00

Beyond

from our view
a moment in time
it passes quickly
both yours and mine

we can't see
what is to come
we barely see
what's already done

it's all laid out
nothing is hidden
there are no suprises
from circumstances we get in

To a mighty God
He sees it all
Our mighty mighty God
Not a sparrow falls
Our God is an amazing God
Beyond time
Beyond the way we think

He's not bound
to any limits
His timeless majesty
shines from within it

His ways are not ours
His thoughts are much higher
Nothing can squelch
His mighty and blinding fire

He's a mighty God
He sees it all
Our mighty mighty God
Not a sparrow falls
Our God is an amazing God
Beyond time
Beyond the way we think

My thoughts exactly :)

Magnify the LORD

2009-12-08T17:38:00.000-08:00

I was listening to John Piper's Don't Waste Your Life, and heard an interesting bit.

We are told to magnify the LORD. It is the purpose of our life. But there are two kinds of magnification.

The first is the magnification of a microscope. A microscope brings tiny little cells to the screen, magnifying them and making them look huge. This is NOT what we do with God. We do not make a small and obscure God look bigger through our lives.

Rather, the second form of magnification is correct. This form is that of a telescope. The telescope looks at things like stars and planets, which are HUGE. It brings what is large and glorious into visibility. The planet was already magnificent, but the telescope brings it into view and shows it clearly to the world.

Let's be the best telescopes ever! :D

Glory to the Newborn King

2009-12-07T14:15:00.000-08:00

Anybody notice that the Christmas songs are creeping out? We sang this one at church Sunday (and sang it very well I might add). There's always one point in the year where the impact of Christmas hits me--Sunday, listening to this song was it. Hail the incarnate Diety, born that man no more may die!

Hark the herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!

Peace on earth and mercy mild

God and sinners reconciled

"Joyful, all ye nations rise"

Join the triumph of the skies

With the angelic host proclaim:

"Christ is born in Bethlehem"

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Christ by highest heav'n adored

Christ the everlasting Lord!

Late in time behold Him come

Offspring of a Virgin's womb

Veiled in flesh the Godhead see

Hail the incarnate Deity

Pleased as man with man to dwell

Jesus, our Emmanuel

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!

Hail the Son of Righteousness!

Light and life to all He brings

Ris'n with healing in His wings

Mild He lays His glory by

Born that man no more may die

Born to raise the sons of earth

Born to give them second birth

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Listen to this video and sing the words--see if you can tell what I mean.

LORD, I'm your servant

2009-12-06T14:59:00.000-08:00

Father, you are the Sovereign LORD,

and I am dust upon the floor.

Your power and purity brightens my life,

though I often block it out and and ignore your wondrous light.

No more, my Jesus. Drive it far from me.

You are the Master--the writer of my story,

but as a simple human girl, I cannot see the glory.

I do not know what you have planned.

Reveal it, O LORD, though I may not understand.

For to obey my God is by far my greatest wish,

and everything you want is what I must accomplish.

I will not lean on my understanding

for even I do not trust in my own speculating.

But I know, my Jesus, that you have an idea.

Let me in on the action--please make your scheme clear.

Whatever you say is what I will do.

My story will be the one written by You.

Uncertainties, uncertainties....

2009-12-05T19:13:00.000-08:00

I have come to a strange conclusion.

I'm getting all growed up!

I don't know how or why. Don't FEEL any different. But all of a sudden, all my friends are in college, and going away, and working, and getting married, and having babies and all...and I'M NEXT!!!! College choices, future life choices, all these things loom just outside the door.

Sound a little scary?

What I can see myself doing in the future is getting my degree and going on to teaching maybe middle-school English. But even starting and finishing school is all up to God. Not to mention I'd really like to be married and have my own children to teach at some point. And with that one there's REALLY nothing I can do, or would want to do, to influence that! But what I mostly hope is that one day he'll send the perfect hero my way...one that he has saved and built just to be for me. Some people call that silly or highly unlikely. And to be honest, it often feels that way to me too! Why would God have made someone just for me and me for them? And how will I know who it is? How will he know who I am? The more you think of the improbabilities, the more hopeless it sounds.

But my God is the same God that did the amazing things in the Bible.

Gideon was just some random kid who God chose to save Israel.

God told Samuel the exact man in all of the land to be king--more than once.

He had a special eye on a no-status girl named Mary, and made her the mother of his son.

God hand picked Noah's family and rescued them when he destroyed all the earth in a flood.

And, in addition to all this proof, I know God has a special eye on my life. He even pays attention to the little things--one time I was feeling down for no reason and was randomly blabbering to God, and mentioned that some flowers would be nice. I moved on to the next subject without thinking anything of it, but later I was sitting outside and my lil bro runs up to me with a big grin. He holds up a little pink, wilty, weedy bloom, complete with roots and dirt clumps hanging at the bottom. "This is for you Meg!" he yells, plops it on my knee, and runs away. I was confused for a minute, until I realized what this little thing WAS--a gift from God. I laughed and thanked him, and sat with my little weed, feeling much better :) If God can do THAT, of COURSE he can do the big things!

What am I worried about?

My new favorite quote

2009-12-04T12:29:00.000-08:00

I heard my new favorite quote in apologetics this week. You shall hear it at the end--no skipping :) Let's start with a passage from John 11.

Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. "Take away the stone," he said.

"But, Lord," said Martha, the sister of the dead man, "by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days."
Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"
So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, "Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me."
When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, "Lazarus, come out!" The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.

Jesus said to them, "Take off the grave clothes and let him go."

Let us compare this with Jesus's resurrection in John 20...

"Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance. So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved, and said, "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don't know where they have put him!"
So Peter and the other disciple started for the tomb. Both were running, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. He bent over and looked in at the strips of linen lying there but did not go in. Then Simon Peter, who was behind him, arrived and went into the tomb. He saw the strips of linen lying there, as well as the burial cloth that had been around Jesus' head. The cloth was folded up by itself, separate from the linen. Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed."

There are a few major differences in these resurrections. First and most obvious: Jesus was God, Lazarus was a man. But notice that in Lazarus's case, the previously dead man walked out, all wrapped up in grave clothes. When the disciples walked into the tomb, the grave clothes were still there. Now you don't see this when you just read this the first time, but I have heard Christian historians who know how dead people used to be wrapped up say that, from their recorded position, the cloths had not been moved at all. But notice, the rolling away of the stone happened in both occasions. Lazarus needed the stone to be rolled away so that he could come out. But evidently, Jesus went right through the clothes, so obviously he didn't NEED that angel to go up and roll the stone away.

And now my new favorite quote:

The stone to Jesus's tomb was rolled away not to let Him out--but to let us in.

Interesting Bit...

2009-11-28T15:41:00.000-08:00

When Hezekiah became king (the first good one in a good while) he reestablished the temple of the LORD and made offerings and set the people up to serve him yet again. He also invited all Israel and Judah to come to the temple to celebrate the passover, something which had probably not been done in a while. The king's couriers went all throughout the land with letters, telling all the people to come and please God by doing this. But you know what? The couriers were mostly just mocked by the people! The people had been distant from God for so long, that many of them weren't open to Him anymore. BUT some people humbled themselves and came to the temple for the feast.

All happy and good right? Not quite. If you remember, there were many rules and that went into the eating of the passover. The LORD was very particular about which hand they were to hold the staff in, what they were to wear, etc. Not to mention they had to go to Jerusalem for a ceremonial cleansing--otherwise they could not eat the passover. But in this case, the children of Israel were just creeping back to God, mostly unfamiliar with his commands. Listen to this!

Although most of the many people who came from Ephraim, Manasseh, Issachar and Zebulun had not purified themselves, yet they ate the Passover, contrary to what was written. But Hezekiah prayed for them, saying, "May the LORD, who is good, pardon everyone who sets his heart on seeking God--the LORD, the God of his fathers--even if he is not clean according to the rules of the sanctuary." And the LORD heard Hezekiah and healed the people.

~ 2 Chronicles 30:18-20

I read that a couple of times to let that sink in. A zillion things ran through my head of what all that actually meant! The LORD just cleansed the people who were set on serving him! The first thing I think of is that our God is the same yesterday and today and forever--he is always devising schemes and sacrificing and forgiving and cleansing so that we may be close to him. I also thought of Peter's vision. Where the sheet full of unclean animals keeps dropping down and the LORD says, "Do not call unclean what the LORD has made clean".

I also thought it interesting that God did it on nothing other than Hezekiah's simple request for their pardon. I have been wondering if, even today, we can pray for God to forgive others of sins they don't know they have commited. After all, Jesus asked the LORD to forgive those who were crucifying him, because they did not know what they were doing. It doesn't say clearly whether God did, but I guess I'm just curious to know the length of God's forgivespan ;)

Any thoughts? What popped into your head when you read that passage?

God is like a Indy Colts game...

2009-11-20T19:29:00.000-08:00

I knew it before, and now I know it again! It is sooooo true that His ways are beyond understanding! Just when I am reconciled to the fact the God has chosen to be silent for the moment, He bursts out into something amazing. Not amazing to the general public, but not only did it make my day--it made up for my previous bad days. Our God is always up to something...at first you think He's not going to do something, then He does it. He'll keep you on the edge of your seat, then pull through for you at the last minute.

He is like a good Colts game.

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

~ Isaiah 41:10

It's awesome that God always keeps His promise, whether or not it looks like He will. Lord, thank you for pulling through even in the little things, and thank you for the people that you work through in this fallen world!

Be PREPARED!!!

2009-11-16T12:42:00.000-08:00

I am taking an class called FOUNDATIONS OF APOLOGETICS done by Ravi Zecharias. It is soooooooooooooooooooo good. These past 4 lessons have been about what apologetics are, how and why we use them, establishing what a worldview is, etc. I thought I'd post some basic notes from the first lesson, which was really good and revealing.

Defining Apologetics

"But in your hearts honor Christ the LORD as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that you have that is in you; yet do this with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that when you are slandered by those who rebuke your good behavior in Christ, they may be put to shame." ~ 1 Peter 3:15-16

The word we translate as "apologetics" is the Greek word "apologia" which means "to give a defense".

The command to be prepared to make a defense was given to the Church (not to a specialist)
The goal of apologetics is not to introduce a dose of confusion into the gospel in order to make it sound more profound. It is about communicating the profundity of the gospel so as to remove any confusion surrounding it.
This command was given to a church that was being persecuted. The command to give an apologetic was given in a context in which you could lose your life for obeying it.
The context for this command is teaching about holiness. We preach a life-changing gospel.

1. "IN YOUR HEARTS HONOR CHRIST THE LORD"

The Greek word for heart is the seat of the emotional and intellectual life.
Before the command to give a defense is given, we're told that we have to be in the right spiritual place before Christ in order to engage in that spiritual battle.
Apologetics is not only an academic exercise; it is a spiritual discipline.
We have become spiritually ineffective because we don't know what we believe or why.

2. "ALWAYS BEING PREPARED"

The Greek word for prepared carries the connotation of getting fit
Just as physical fitness requires years of training, the command to be prepared anticipates continual hard work.

3. "TO MAKE A DEFENSE"

Paul makes an apologetic before King Agrippa (acts 26).
The apologetic is inherently tied up with evangelism.
When you're giving a defense, you're not simply answering other people's questions. You're also questioning other people's answers or even questioning the questions themselves.

Why Should We Ask Questions?

Asking questions forces people to open up within their general assumptions

In Luke 18:18, when the rich young ruler asks Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life, instead of answering him, Jesus asks a question.
Jesus's question undermined the assumption that we get to heaven by being good.

2. Asking questions forces people to open up within cultural assumptions.

In Matthew 22:15, Jesus is asked a yes or no question. ("Should we pay our taxes?")
The question is actually a trap
By asking a question, Jesus forces them to open up within their cultural assumption that paying taxes makes one unholy.
Giving the right answer to the wrong question is always wrong.

3. Asking questions exposes faulty logic

In Matthew 22 the Sadducees pose to Jesus what is known as a faulty dilemma. Any option you choose to answer it will be wrong, similar to the question, "does your mother know you're stupid?"
By exposing their faulty logic, Jesus forced them to question their own question!

4. Asking questions exposes motive

In Matthew 21, after Jesus cleared the Temple, the chief priests asked him, "By whose authority are you doing these things?"
Jesus answered by asking them where the authority of John the Baptist had come from.
Jesus showed that they were not truly interested in hearing the answer.
Although it is important to expose people's motives, we're going to have to remember to do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience.

5. Asking questions exposes contradictions

In Matthew 22, Jesus asks "Whose son is the Christ?" then shows them the contradiction in their thinking.
As a contemporary parallel, there is an inherent contradiction in the claim, "There's no such thing as truth."
Roger Scruton has pointed out that when people say there is no such thing as truth, they are effectively asking you not to believe them!

6. Asking questions insures a conversation

People don't like to be talked at". They want to be "talked to".
If you study the gospels, you'll see that Jesus did preach, he did perform miracles, but he spent an awful lot of time talking to people.

7. Asking questions makes people think

The difference between an argument and a discussion is that a discussion makes people think.

4. "TO ANYONE WHO ASKS YOU"

This assumes people are asking.
The hallmark of a postmodern generation isn't the fact that people have lost sight of the answers, but that we've raised a generation of people who say it's not even worth asking the question.
Most of the work is not in providing the solution; it's about getting them to ask the right question.
Our lifestyle should be provoking questions.
If people aren't asking us questions, the first thing we should do is not blame the society in which we live, but take a look inside our own heart and ask how we ourselves are living.

5. "FOR A REASON"

The word for "reason is the Greek "logos" from which we get the word logic.
It implies that the gospel is capable of being explained.
"Good news that isn't explained not only isn't good, it isn't even news." (John Piper)
If the answer to why you became a Christian is the same as how you became a Christian, you are not really giving a reason.
JESUS should be the reason we are Christian.

6. "FOR THE HOPE THAT IS IN YOU"

You cannot take the Christ out of Christian.
Any answer that does not flow to or flow from the cross in ultimately a bankrupt apologetic.

7. "DO THIS WITH GENTLENESS AND RESPECT, HAVING A GOOD CONSCIENCE"

We do this with gentleness so that our attitude doesn't crowd out the gospel.
We keep a good conscience. We don't pretend to know things we don't know.

Apologetics is the evangelistic theology that is able to walk out into the marketplace and engage with you neighbors, with your friends, with those around you so that they may come to know Him."

The things God does.......

2009-11-13T08:38:00.000-08:00

God is love.

He is the very incarnation of love.

Love wouldn't exist were it not for him.

He is incapable of evil.

His word proves all this.

He has never done anything wrong.

He has never made a bad decision.

None of his plans have ever been foiled.

He has good in mind for each of his children.

He doesn't plot harm to any of them.

Everything he does is part of his plan and glorious purpose.

He loved us enough to take the penalty for our sin.

After all this and more, it seems impossible that we wouldn't be able to trust everything he chose to do. It sounds silly to say that sometimes I wish God would do things differently.

The Modern Skeptic by GA Chesterton

2009-11-07T12:51:00.000-08:00

The new rebel is a skeptic, and will not entirely trust anything.

He has no loyalty, therefore he can never be a true rebelutionist. And that fact that he doubts everything gets in his way when he wants to denounce anything. For all denunciation implies a moral doctrine of some kind, and the modern rebelutionist doubts not only the institution he denounces, but the doctrine by which he denounces it...

As a politician he cries out that war is a waste of life, then as a philosopher that life itself is a waste of time.

A Russian pessimist will denounce a policeman for killing a peasant, then prove by the highest philosophical principles that the peasant ought to have killed himself.

A man denounces marriage as a lie, then denounces aristocratic profligates for treating it as a lie.

A man goes first into a political meeting where he complains that savages are treated as if they were beasts, then takes his hat and umbrella and goes into a scientific meeting, where he proves that they practically are beasts.

In short, the modern revolutionist, being an infinite skeptic, is always engaged in undermining his own mind.

In his book on politics, he attacks men for trampling on morality. In his book on ethics, he attacks morality for trampling on men.

Therefore the modern man in revolt has become practically useless for all purposes of revolt. By rebelling against everything, he has lost his right to rebel against anything.

And THAT should give you enough to think about for the rest of the day :)

Thoughts of Freedom and Sin

2009-11-02T12:37:00.000-08:00

All have sinned and fallen short (by a long way) of the glory of God. We as Christians know this better than anyone else. But when we come to the LORD, we know that he sets us free, cleanses us, and makes us new. An amazing thing.

I am not like some, who had a horrible life before they came to the LORD, but I know this is the case for many. I can't put myself in their shoes of course, but it seems like being free and cleansed in Christ would be a whole different experience than it has been for me. I can't remember any heinous sins I committed before the age of four when I accepted Christ--my relationship with God has always kind of been there and been growing as time goes on. So I can't remember ever a time when I sinned and I didn't get a talk about it with the Holy Spirit. There have been MANY of those times and will be many more. I still get upset over my sin and get frustrated that it's still there--after all, I've been disrespectful since I was four, why does it go on? You know what I mean?

All that to lead up to this: my experience with sin is different than some of those who come to Christ later in life. Some have done horrible things that were detestable to God even before they knew him, and now that they do know him they are very upset about them. Let's say there was a guy who spent every day of his life for 3 years killing one person per day. After the daily murder, let's say he went on to a bank and robbed a different bank of at least $50,000 every day. Then we'll say that every day after these things, he sold all kinds of drugs to school kids and spent the rest of his night causing fights in bars.

All this every day. And then he came to Christ.

After he came to Christ, I guess he'd turn himself in to the law and get sent to prison for...I'd guess that should be about the rest of his life :) But all the while in prison he spends the whole time studying the word, talking to pastors, listening to tapes, becomes a really nice guy, and starts a ministry in the prison that converts several other prisoners to Christ. Now this man LOVES the LORD like crazy, and now he feels as awfully about his life as you or I would. Or worse.

What should his attitude be?

God says his grace and mercy are limitless, and this man would be just as much his child as I am. This much I know. His sin would be rendered powerless against God. But he still did it. It was all still committed. He could bemoan his past and all the things he did, constantly saying what a horrible person he was, and suffer in his dreams every night because of his past sin. He could resolve not to get into deep relationships with anyone because he wouldn't want to involve them in who he had been. If he did these things, I would not blame him in the least--it almost seems that he SHOULD think this way after all that sin! I think I probably would!

But here is what I've been thinking about...is this mindset, even in these circumstances, honoring to God? If God's power and grace are more powerful than this sin, is it right to dwell on your past, now that you are clean? CAN you or SHOULD you behave as a cleansed and righteous one? My gut says that if the LORD has freed you, you are free indeed, and can tell all with a clear conscience that you are the child of God that you are and not different than any other of God's saved ones. My gut says that dwelling in the past is insulting the blood of the Lamb, who has got rid of this past.

But something else (maybe it's my head) thinks that still bemoaning your past and your sin makes sense and is ok...we ARE supposed to grieve about our sin, and maybe if you had THAT MUCH sin than this would be an ok measure to take. Maybe I just think it makes sense because this is probably what I would do in the circumstances.

This probably sounded completely random, but it's what I've been thinking :) Any thoughts?

Esther and delights of reading slowly

2009-10-29T13:54:00.000-07:00

Does anybody know who wrote the book of Esther? Because I am reading through it and for the first time noticing how much I LOVE how it is written! There is great description of EVERYTHING and it is such an amazing story! I am loving going through it slowly. We see that Esther, who has been raised by her cousin, is very obedient to him. And in the study I am doing, it brought up the idea that, since she was so used to obeying and being respectful to Mordecai, it carried over to Hegai, who was in charge of her beauty treatments. A neat thought that I had never thought of, that :)

I've also noticed some really funny things about Haman's character. He calls his friends over JUST to brag, and also throws formal pity parties! I'm laughing as I type :D

And here's a nice ditty - Esther knows that food is a good way to open up a request :D The first thing she does is invite the King to TWO dinners before she makes such a great request as to be granted her and her people's life. I'm told by my parents that is is still effective today--and I've used it once or twice myself ;P

Can yall tell I'm having fun studying slowly? ;P

Thoughts on reading through the Bible in 90 days

2009-10-28T08:13:00.000-07:00

It was a wild ride! Most days I would start reading in the morning and slowly tackle bits of it through the day and finish it all up at night. There were days when I fell behind, and when you fall behind, it takes a looooooooooooong time to catch back up! :P The best thing about it was that, no matter what passage anybody brought up at church or whenever, I was able to do, "Oh yeah, I just read that" and everything was fresh on my mind. (That being said, it's a lot to have on your mind ;) ) Also, of course, I can now say I read through the Bible in 90 days and that's fun :) Most of the time the reading was fun to do as well, except of course when the days reading is 15 chapters of Numbers :P All this said, here are the bad things about it:

Everything was at the speed of light - no time to think deeply about anything before BANG! You're in the next book of the Bible. And once you start, there's no turning back! It's impossible! Once you have that reading plan in your favorites online it's always there wanting you to come back! Also, with all the reading there is to do, it is oftentimes hard to see it as time with the LORD, as opposed to assigned homework or something of the like. I really had to work hard emotionally to keep my head where it was supposed to be. Toward the end I finally got into a groove of reading half during the day to get it done, and then taking some time on the last half at night for some more study and talking to God. If you're going to take this on, do it this way :)

All things considered, it was a big challenge with not a whole lot to show at the end of it. Though I can't really say this, because who knows? Maybe God trekked me through it because I'll need the experience for...something. Or maybe he cleared out some things in my heart I'm not aware of, or just used it opened a door to make space for something He'll put in my life at some time. So, I shall end with this:

Read through the Bible in 90 days if God tells you to do it :)

Stepping into Jeremiah

2009-10-21T09:29:00.000-07:00

Officially 5 days until I finish the Bible!!!! After I finish I plan on doing a study called Beauty and the Pig by Pam Forster, on the subject of Godly beauty. We started it a while back and then moved and never finished it, but it was good from what I remember and I'm excited about it!!! There should be more blog posts as well, since I am not tackling the reading at various times through the day and then getting done at 10pm.

But before then, I must tread the dangerous waters of the book of Jeremiah.

I may have said this before, but Jeremiah is the hardest read in the entire Bible for me. I can't put a finger on why this is, or how to fix it or anything. Not to mention I am surprised that in this 90-day Bible reading plan we are taking almost as long to read through Jeremiah as we did with Psalms. Am I the only one who thinks this way about it? If I'm not, please share your thoughts, and if I am, can somebody give me an idea as to why this would be so that I can fix it?! I don't WANT to dread reading Jeremiah, and there's no blatant reason it should be a hard book, besides the fact that the whole message of it is rather depressing. But not beyond readability, I generally don't mind depressation as long as I know everything ends up all right :)

And a prayer request - most of our kiddos are sick right now, and Jdude's got bronchitis (I'm calling him Bronchiosaurus ;P) and a double ear infection. I've got some sniffles and other weird things and I think everybody's got some symptoms >:Z My cuz has the swine flu too. Pray that flu season passes quickly and without further event!

An aspect of God I never really noticed or thought of before

2009-09-14T15:45:00.001-07:00

I love it when people are nice to me for no reason. When I'm talking to someone and they take a particular interest in what's up with me I feel special. When somebody sends me an email, private messages me, posts on my facebook wall, or otherwise goes out of their way to think of me when I'm not even there with them it just about makes my day. I think everybody likes it, but it means more to some than others :) I try to do it to other people since I like it so much. But for some reason I never thought that God ever thought about it. I read in Genesis 15 that God randomly comes up to Abram and says,

"Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward."

How cool is THAT, thinks I!!!! Our God is a thoughtful God! Abram wasn't about to attack an army with a ball-point pen, or stand up to 50 giants with one bouncy ball as a weapon. It was just random--God knew when Abram needed/wanted a boost.

This is what I have noticed and now very much like about God. I wonder how many aspects of Him I'll discover as time goes on? It's just amazing that God has so much to Him anyway!

By the way--go drop a note on your friend's blog, it's nice to do :)

Heads Held High

2009-09-08T06:30:00.000-07:00

I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt so that you would no longer be slaves to the Egyptians; I broke the bars of your yoke and enabled you to walk with heads held high.

~ Leviticus 26:13

The Israelites were being oppressed and enslaved by the Egyptians, but God miraculously freed them. You may not be a slave to people, but what ARE you enslaved by? Jealousy? Temptation? Feelings? A sin that won't go away? Maybe all these things. I find I'm enslaved by little bitty sneaky things and don't know it until it grows and goes on and on - then it's harder to beat. But the good thing is... we don't have to beat it alone! It is much easier to talk to Jesus about your slavery than to try and free yourself (it worked for the Israelites didn't it?)

Ready to walk with your head held high?

Almost Pure?

2009-09-03T05:23:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: I address my sisters, because I believe this needs to be addressed. I am not implying that I think guys are any better at this, but I will leave them to their own kind for the moment :)

Most of us have made a commitment to God and maybe our parents to remain pure until marriage. This could mean something different for each of us. For some there are other rules like don't hold hands with guys, don't even TALK to guys, or for some it's ok to get a new boyfriend every Thursday as long as you're technically pure. To each her own--I am not addressing the rules and wherefores of our commitments. Whatever you've worked out with the Lord and your parents if fine with me. But as far as I am concerned, purity, means keeping my body, heart, and mind only for my future husband.

But this is what I have seen recently from Colorado to Arkansas--some are missing it.

Our bodies our pure. Maybe our hearts haven't even been very fiddled with. I'm not going to go into big details about who's doing what and what's wrong when, but here is what I think is going on in this world among the pure--our MINDS are going CRAZY!!!!!

Guys = toys
We judge guys by their looks, good or bad (though we all do this with any sex, but it needs to stop)
As soon as we meet a guy, they are a new plaything or potential relationship
A guy cannot even TALK to us without our minds playing crazy games

What is our excuse? Not only are these mind games unfair to our commitments--they are unfair to guys. I love guys and I have great guy friends. Call me crazy, but I think a guy should be able to be friends with a girl without her building castles in the air all around him. It even FEELS stupid to type, but we all do it, including me. It's not fair and it's wrong to let our brains do things like that. Not to mention that EVERYONE can read this. Just because it's in our heads doesn't make it a secret. It shows itself in our actions to everyone but ourselves - we all know it is easy to see when a girl begins to drool over a guy behind his back. Or worse, to his face.

I have addressed the least vile and offensive of our shortcomings involving purity. But it is the one I have noticed more than anything else, and besides, if it were anything worse I don't think it would be my place to talk about it :) Can't we just be friends with guys? Is it impossible in this day and age? The brain plays around in every girl - what are we to do?

Thoughts anyone?

I'm doing the Lucy thing

2009-08-28T12:02:00.000-07:00

When my lil sis Lucy started out posting bible time stuff she began by posting a scripture and ending with "I don't know what that means". We always kinda give her grief, but now I'm gonna try it out.

"Let him who does wrong continue to do wrong; let him who is vile continue to be vile; let him who does right continue to do right; and let him who is holy continue to be holy." ~ Rev 22:11

This is in the last chapter of Revelation where it is talking about the end being near. So why should the vile ones continue to vileize? Why should they not repent? I'm probably missing something really obvious here, but this is a mite confusing. Any thoughts?

Mighty To Save

2009-08-26T17:08:00.000-07:00

Everyone needs compassion,

Love that's never failing;

Let mercy fall on me.

Everyone needs forgiveness,

The kindness of a Saviour;

The Hope of nations.

Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

So take me as You find me,

All my fears and failures,

Fill my life again.

I give my life to follow

Everything I believe in,

Now I surrender.

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

Shine your light and let the whole world see,

We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

My Saviour, you can move the mountains,

You are mighty to save,

You are mighty to save.

Forever, Author of Salvation,

You rose and conquered the grave,

Yes you conquered the grave

"Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last. I am the Living One; I was dead, and behold I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades." ~ Revelation 1:17-18

Just ordinary dudes

2009-08-16T13:10:00.000-07:00

Today Jesus left his disciples. But before he left, they recieved the Holy Spirit for the first time. Now I came to Christ when I was too little to really know/remember the difference, and I can't imagine NOT having the Holy Spirit. Check out how radical it was here in Acts:

Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting. They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that separated and came to rest on each of them. All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them.
Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard them speaking in his own language. Utterly amazed, they asked: "Are not all these men who are speaking Galileans? Then how is it that each of us hears them in his own native language? Parthians, Medes and Elamites; residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya near Cyrene; visitors from Rome both Jews and converts to Judaism Cretans and Arabs—we hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!" Amazed and perplexed, they asked one another, "What does this mean?"
Some, however, made fun of them and said, "They have had too much wine."

Then Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice and addressed the crowd: "Fellow Jews and all of you who live in Jerusalem, let me explain this to you; listen carefully to what I say. These men are not drunk, as you suppose. It's only nine in the morning! No, this is what was spoken by the prophet Joel:

" 'In the last days, God says,

I will pour out my Spirit on all people.

Your sons and daughters will prophesy,

your young men will see visions,

your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women,

I will pour out my Spirit in those days,

and they will prophesy. I will show wonders in the heaven above

and signs on the earth below,

blood and fire and billows of smoke.

The sun will be turned to darkness

and the moon to blood

before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.

And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.' "

I can't imagine how amazing that would be and how many nights I would be not able to sleep just thinking of all this meant to the world from there on out.

Through the Gospels at the speed of light

2009-08-11T14:20:00.000-07:00

My reading plan is ruthless - it has me reading Jesus's death, resurrection, and birth all on the same day in different books! It's a crazy ride, but reading different people's accounts of the same thing is interesting, because I remember what Matthew said about the rich young ruler fresh when I'm reading it in Mark 30 minutes later :) But anyway, reading through them this time I noticed much more emphasis on John the Baptist than I'd noticed before. Take a look at these quotes by Jesus about John...

"What did you go out into the desert to see? A reed swayed by the wind? If not, what did you go out to see? A man dressed in fine clothes? No, those who wear fine clothes are in kings' palaces. Then what did you go out to see? A prophet? Yes, I tell you, and more than a prophet. This is the one about whom it is written: 'I will send my messenger ahead of you, who will prepare your way before you.' I tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet he who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he. From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it. For all the Prophets and the Law prophesied until John. And if you are willing to accept it, he is the Elijah who was to come. He who has ears, let him hear."

And then later...

"But I tell you, Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him, but have done to him everything they wished."

John had a neat life - he was born to his parents in their old age and he is famous for his time in the desert baptizing and eating bugs with honey. He was Herod's favorite speaker (even though he didn't understand him) and was beheaded because of a woman who had some problem with him. This? This great prophet that was to come before Jesus? He certainly didn't have the most glamorous life. Most of the prophets in the Bible have this common theme of prophecying and then being persecuted normally like everybody else. But John is a little different than all these guys. We talk about Moses being loved by God and all that, but check John out! I look forward to talking to this guy in heaven one day.

2009-08-10T15:09:00.000-07:00

Please pray for my focus (yes, again). I'm feeling a bit flurried and/or distracted in my spiritual life.

This is really all I have to say. 90 day reading is going well, I am staying caught up and all. I think I'll like taking it slow when this is done and actually really STUDY the stuff.

Those Iffy Things

2009-08-07T11:08:00.000-07:00

Ever been in a situation in which your conscience was getting pricked, but it really couldn't be helped without being rude? Like maybe eating a ham dinner at someone's house when you don't eat pork, or getting invited to a party that may not be such a good idea. 1 Corinthians 10 addresses such matters.

"Eat anything sold in the meat market without raising questions of conscience, for, 'The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it.'

If some unbeliever invites you to a meal and you want to go, eat whatever is put before you without raising questions of conscience. But if anyone says to you, "This has been offered in sacrifice," then do not eat it, both for the sake of the man who told you and for conscience' sake— the other man's conscience, I mean, not yours. For why should my freedom be judged by another's conscience? If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for?
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God—even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved."

What do you get out of this? Is this iffy thing you're thinking about doing be glorifying to God? It's not an easy answer - if you DIDN'T eat the ham and hurt your hosts feelings, that would not be God-honoring or good for your reputation as a Christian. I found the part about "trying to please everybody for the sake of the gospel" very interesting. If I'm going about offending people in any way, what I believe in and what is important to me is probably not desirable for those around me. Just a little food for thought...

Doncha love when God works these things out?

2009-08-02T10:57:00.000-07:00

This morning I read the part in Ezekiel where Ezekiel is getting a tour of the temple by the angel who is measuring everything. Twas quite long and I couldn't get a point out of it for the life of me. But before I could think/pray about it further, it was time for church.

Went to Eastside Baptist. Great worship! Then when it was sermon time, the main passages of what the message was on showed up on the screen. Whoa! Ezekial 47! Maybe somebody knows what this is all about!!! Before we go any further, here is the passage in question:

The man brought me back to the entrance of the temple, and I saw water coming out from under the threshold of the temple toward the east (for the temple faced east). The water was coming down from under the south side of the temple, south of the altar. He then brought me out through the north gate and led me around the outside to the outer gate facing east, and the water was flowing from the south side.
As the man went eastward with a measuring line in his hand, he measured off a thousand cubits and then led me through water that was ankle-deep. He measured off another thousand cubits and led me through water that was knee-deep. He measured off another thousand and led me through water that was up to the waist. He measured off another thousand, but now it was a river that I could not cross, because the water had risen and was deep enough to swim in—a river that no one could cross. He asked me, "Son of man, do you see this?"

Then he led me back to the bank of the river. When I arrived there, I saw a great number of trees on each side of the river. He said to me, "This water flows toward the eastern region and goes down into the Arabah, where it enters the Sea. When it empties into the Sea, the water there becomes fresh. Swarms of living creatures will live wherever the river flows. There will be large numbers of fish, because this water flows there and makes the salt water fresh; so where the river flows everything will live. Fishermen will stand along the shore; from En Gedi to En Eglaim there will be places for spreading nets. The fish will be of many kinds—like the fish of the Great Sea. But the swamps and marshes will not become fresh; they will be left for salt. Fruit trees of all kinds will grow on both banks of the river. Their leaves will not wither, nor will their fruit fail. Every month they will bear, because the water from the sanctuary flows to them. Their fruit will serve for food and their leaves for healing."

Now you all may be more spiritually minded than me, but I was saying, "Wha......???" The pastor gave us the example of his three-year-old in a kiddie pool. It's really fun and great while she's 3, but when she's 16 it won't be the same. He said that the water in the passage was the water of the Holy Spirit - the living water. First it was ankle deep, then knee deep, then waist deep, and soon Ezekiel was swimming in the water. I wondered how deep I was in my spiritual growth. Does living water flow through you onto a dead world, making all live?

So my questions of this morning were all cleared up today perfectly. God gave me the passage, I didn't understand it, so he set up an explanation to the parable in the same day. Oh so thoughtful...

God is Just

2009-07-31T11:37:00.000-07:00

Look what I unexpectedly ran into in Ezekiel today! It was a bit surprising because it was in the middle of all the curses of the ungodly places, but I love how God puts in little (or big) blurbs of hope when all hope seems to be lost.

"Son of man, say to the house of Israel, 'This is what you are saying: "Our offenses and sins weigh us down, and we are wasting away because of them. How then can we live?" ' Say to them, 'As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways and live. Turn! Turn from your evil ways! Why will you die, O house of Israel?'

"Therefore, son of man, say to your countrymen, 'The righteousness of the righteous man will not save him when he disobeys, and the wickedness of the wicked man will not cause him to fall when he turns from it. The righteous man, if he sins, will not be allowed to live because of his former righteousness.' If I tell the righteous man that he will surely live, but then he trusts in his righteousness and does evil, none of the righteous things he has done will be remembered; he will die for the evil he has done. And if I say to the wicked man, 'You will surely die,' but he then turns away from his sin and does what is just and right - if he gives back what he took in pledge for a loan, returns what he has stolen, follows the decrees that give life, and does no evil, he will surely live; he will not die."

~ Ezekiel 33:10-15

This passage, to me, seems to be the very epitome of justice. Sometimes God is only even brought into the picture of people's lives when something happens that strikes them as "unfair". When something good happens it's, "Wow I got a raise! I do deserve it, I've been working at this job forever, I'm awesome, I I I I." But when something bad happens, all of a sudden God is responsible for everything that's ever happened. "Why do I have to have cancer, I'm a good person, this is so unfair!" This passage alone proves that God's mind does not work unfairly.

It's not His nature.

I have accepted the challenge!!!

2009-07-29T11:20:00.000-07:00

I was just on Biblegateway.com to look up a verse, when I saw a little blurb that said, "Read Through the Bible in 90 Days Challenge Starts TODAY!" or something to that extent. My eyebrows went up and I clicked the link - you know, just to see how it was done...

Turns out they give you your reading assignment on the site every day. I dove right in and just read Lamentations 1 - Ezekiel 12. Don't know what prompted this decision but I am excited about it! Check it out everyone! The way I figure it, it's ok if you don't get all the reading done in that day - reading through the Bible in 90 days is NOT the path to all spirituality folks, it is just an exciting challenge! Join me, anyone? It is Summer after all... click here for more info.

Focus...focus...focus...

2009-07-24T07:35:00.000-07:00

Not having a permanent church with good worship and teaching, and a has jarred my focus a bit. Not much - but Satan likes the little footholds just as much as the big ones. I think I'm just spoiled. Hence, I'm being careful to stay consistent with my time in the Word and working on a better prayer life. Pray for me everyone! And pray for our future perfect church to show itself!

Random ramblings to make me feel better that probably nobody will read and that's a good thing :)

2009-07-12T21:46:00.000-07:00

The truck is here - we're really leaving. We've got awesome family here helping out with the crazy truck situation. I don't see why it has to be so complicated!

But on to the fact of the matter - today was the last time I'll have walked n and out of the doors of our church until the time in the future that God has designed. I've said goodbye to many these past few days - really good friends - not knowing when I'd see them again, but I couldn't cry. I felt deeply - my stomach would hurt and my mouth would get dry and I'd wish I could cry to maybe make me feel a little better, but I couldn't. But this morning all through service I cried off and on and the end was the worst: saying goodbye!

I bawled.

Hugs all around and goodbyes and everything I really don't enjoy. I still can't believe it's over - all these people that have been friends, mentors, people I can just ramble to, people that will pray for me, people to laugh with, cry with, be aggravated with, learn with, completely lose yourself praising God with, and have basically been a family to me...all this in a little over a year...and it's all over. I was a complete mess to say the least. When I got home I bawled like I hadn't in years - didn't know I could still do it like that.

I still don't know what God's up to, but I guess it makes sense to believe that he does not have plans to harm me - in fact, quite the opposite. Whyever he brought us this far only to take us back I don't know, but I'd be satisfied if it was only to let us be a part of AHBC for a short time.

Now my big question is, what's next? God, you've led us into and out of the best kind of family I can imagine. Now what could be better? I know there is something, cuz You are planning only the best specially for me.

Guess that's worth being excited about.

But right now it's rrrreeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaalllllllyyy hard.

I love you Alameda Hills!

God my hero

2009-07-01T12:53:00.000-07:00

Two things we should establish right at the start: Number 1 - I am a big sucker for knights. The sense of "awwwww..." I have when I read all those stories about the damsels in distress and the knights ride in and kill the bad guys and save the girls is the one hopelessly romantic streak in my body. When you have a knight at your side nothing TOO terrible can happen, because he is just drooling for the opportunity to save you. Same with a Dad or anybody that cares about you that happens to be bigger and stronger than you. Nothing can be all THAT bad because there is a hero standing by!

Point two - moving is quite scary and uncomfortable and unpleasant and sad and all those horrid things. Especially when you've no place to go and don't really know why you are going. Yes, there are good parts about going, but we're not at those parts yet, so now is all the bad. For some reason my mindset was that God sitting back watching all this stuff happen and thinking that I shouldn't be feeling how I am about it. Sort of a, "Well fine if you feel that way, you're doing it anyway, so you'll get over it." Don't know why I thought this - God certainly didn't say it. But after I realized this was what I was assuming, God showed me that first of all, he had been the ultimate hero in coming to earth as a human and dying in my place so that I could be with him forever. And now he wants to be my hero in my everyday life! He is waiting for when he can rush in and save me and give me good things and make me feel better.

So now, I'm not so worried about what could or could not happen, because I have a hero waiting for me to be in trouble so he can rescue me!

God makes good out of everything

2009-06-18T08:43:00.000-07:00

We all know the story of Jonah, and the getting swallowed by a fish is the most famous part. But I'm going to stop the story before that.

Jonah ran away from God. Deceitful, disobedient, just plain wrong. This was a BAD thing. God sent a storm upon the ship and each person on the ship prayed to their personal god. Jonah said, "throw me overboard it's my fault!" The crewman of the ship didn't want to do that, and tried to row to land, but the storm got even crazier than before. So they said, "O LORD, please do not let us die for taking this man's life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you, O LORD, have done as you pleased." They threw Jonah overboard and the sea became calm. We all know what happened to Jonah, but listen to what happened to the people on the ship - "At this the men greatly feared the LORD, and they offered a sacrifice to the LORD and made vows to him." Never mind all those personal gods - THIS God had just shown his greatness!

God could even use Jonah's disobedience to gather more followers! Not only did Jonah go to Nineveh and THEY repented - the people on the ship all made vows to the God who spared their ship!

Yet another great Psalm

2009-06-17T09:30:00.000-07:00

This was in yesterday's reading, but I really wanted to go back and read it again today. It is Psalm 118 and you can look it up if you wish (you should), but I am going to go through and put my favorite parts here...

In my anguish I cried to the LORD,

and he answered by setting me free.
The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid.

What can man do to me?
The LORD is with me; he is my helper.

I will look in triumph on my enemies.
It is better to take refuge in the LORD

than to trust in man.

I was pushed back and about to fall,

but the LORD helped me.
The LORD is my strength and my song;

he has become my salvation.
Shouts of joy and victory

resound in the tents of the righteous:

"The LORD's right hand has done mighty things!
The LORD's right hand is lifted high;

the LORD's right hand has done mighty things!"
I will not die but live,

and will proclaim what the LORD has done.

A good king

2009-06-15T08:12:00.000-07:00

I read about Abijah king of Judah today and for some reason didn't remember him from before. In this chapter, Israel and the bad king Jeroboam is attacking Judah. Abijah stood on a mountain and yelled, "Jeroboam and all Israel, listen to me! Don't you know that the LORD, the God of Israel, has given the kingship of Israel to David and his descendants forever by a covenant of salt? Yet Jeroboam son of Nebat, an official of Solomon son of David, rebelled against his master. Some worthless scoundrels gathered around him and opposed Rehoboam son of Solomon when he was young and indecisive and not strong enough to resist them. And now you plan to resist the kingdom of the LORD, which is in the hands of David's descendants. You are indeed a vast army and have with you the golden calves that Jeroboam made to be your gods. But didn't you drive out the priests of the LORD, the sons of Aaron, and the Levites, and make priests of your own as the peoples of other lands do? Whoever comes to consecrate himself with a young bull and seven rams may become a priest of what are not gods.
"As for us, the LORD is our God, and we have not forsaken him. The priests who serve the LORD are sons of Aaron, and the Levites assist them. Every morning and evening they present burnt offerings and fragrant incense to the LORD. They set out the bread on the ceremonially clean table and light the lamps on the gold lampstand every evening. We are observing the requirements of the LORD our God. But you have forsaken him. God is with us; he is our leader. His priests with their trumpets will sound the battle cry against you. Men of Israel, do not fight against the LORD, the God of your fathers, for you will not succeed."

But just at that moment, Abijah and his men looked behind them. During this speech that I loved, Rehoboam had sent men to sneak around behind Judah to ambush them! "Oh no!!!!! What do we do!?!?!" They cried out to God to help them, and it says God routed Jeroboam and all Israel before Abijah. Judah killed 500,000 men. Rehoboam escaped that battle, but did not regain power during Abijah's reign. Finally the LORD just struck him down.

And guess what? Abijah's son was good too. That's two good kings in a row!

Describing the LORD

2009-06-10T08:53:00.000-07:00

In the beginning of Hebrews, the angels and the Son are compared. Paul has a great compilation of prophecies and praises about God that he puts together here.

"Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever,

and righteousness will be the scepter of your kingdom.

You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness;

therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions

by anointing you with the oil of joy.

In the beginning, O Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth,

and the heavens are the work of your hands.

They will perish, but you remain;

they will all wear out like a garment.

You will roll them up like a robe;

like a garment they will be changed.

But you remain the same,

and your years will never end."

Is this not as close as it gets to describing God? At least as far as the English language can go.

The Spirit Descends!

2009-06-09T09:04:00.000-07:00

Jesus has just ascended into heaven and the disciples are left behind. The Spirit descended upon them like flames. Can you imagine receiving the Spirit like that? First you're sitting around and then BANG there's fire on your clothes and in your heart! I love reading the first part of Acts - it says the disciples "devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."

Can you imagine that? They had everything in common - no fighting about whether they should sing the old songs or the new ones or arguing about choir robes. They were together praising God - how much better can it get? Not only that, they were favorable in the eyes of everyone, and people came to join them because they wanted to be of their number. Now Christians are definitely NOT in favor of the world - too often we're holier-than-thou and nobody wants what we have because of the way we act. We all know what happens later - persecution. But the disciples didn't care, they kept sharing anyway!

May we be like the early Christians!

Heaven

2009-06-08T13:30:00.000-07:00

The day I first found out we were moving, I was laying in bed thinking how sad leaving our friends and life in CO. I didn't want to fall asleep thinking things like that, so I pulled out a pad and started to write whatever. Turns out, I wrote a scene in which all of my friends from Arkansas and Colorado were altogether with Jesus in heaven. Jesus kicked the angels off the instruments and let us play them and everybody sang and couldn't stop smiling. After all, what was there to stop smiling about? Even Jesus missed a few high notes here and there, and everyone laughed just for the heck of it. Nobody really could think of a reason to stop the singing and talking and laughing until Jesus banged a pot and called everybody outside to His big big yard to play some football!

It sounded like so much fun, and God's been pressing on me lately that just like I will move away, I will someday move to heaven. I had some preconceived notions about heaven at one point in my life like a lot of people have - won't it get boring after a while? But I'm learning that heaven is our number one thing to look forward to! God didn't invent boredom - he invented everything fun and good!

And now, let me hype up the band Foolish Things. They are Colorado natives that broke up as a band a couple of years ago, but their music is AMAZING. It's not the type of music that sticks in your head as your favorite song - it's the type of music that pops up during the hard times in your life and comforts you. Here is the song, "It's Not Home" from their CD, LET'S NOT FORGET THE STORY which is my theme song for the moment.

Time is like a grain of sand on the beaches of eternity

but we're here toiling, planning

like we'll never leave

I know your fire is coming

What will stand the flames?

Will your return find me running

or blind and lame?

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here

It's not home

I'm shocked to see the measure

of where I've been storing treasure

It's not home

The question's calling louder

"Who do you believe?"

and the answer lies upon the things to which we cleave

I know you're gone ahead

to build a place for me

so I'll trust the things you said

Trust though I can't see

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here
It's not home
I'm shocked to see the measure
of where I've been storing treasure
It's not home

Have we believed the fiction

authored by the world's depiction

of how it is?

Let's not forget the story

we're living for his glory now

You laid it down for me

So I lay it down for you

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here

It's not home

I'm shocked to see the measure of where I've been storing treasure

It's not home

I'm not home here

It's not my home

Prayers

2009-06-04T09:36:00.000-07:00

"Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place."

~ 2 Chronicles 7:15

God, please be attentive and answer the prayers when two or three or eleven that are having rough times are gathered in your Name. Give wisdom generously to us - we believe and do not doubt.

Encouragement

2009-06-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

One of the things God's been impressing on me lately is the matter of encouragement. There's a guy at our church who is really good at it. He always has a compliment and says it like he really means it. He's always ready to listen with his whole body no matter what you're talking about and add a few comments. He makes you feel special by encouraging and maybe poking a little fun here and there. Words are something I put a lot of stock into, and I don't really feel like I know how I did on something unless somebody says so, so I really can appreciate compliments on things. I thought the other day, "If I like it so much, maybe other people do too!" I don't very often go out of my way to tell somebody that their nails look cute, but I should! The Bible even tells us to build each other up.

WHAT???

2009-05-29T09:25:00.000-07:00

From FOX NEWS...

Pastor David Jones and his wife Mary have been told that they cannot invite friends to their San Diego, Calif. home for a Bible study — unless they are willing to pay tens of thousands of dollars to San Diego County.
"On Good Friday we had an employee from San Diego County come to our house, and inform us that the Bible study that we were having was a religious assembly, and in violation of the code in the county." David Jones told FOX News.
"We told them this is not really a religious assembly — this is just a Bible study with friends. We have a meal, we pray, that was all," Jones said.
A few days later, the couple received a written warning that cited "unlawful use of land," ordering them to either "stop religious assembly or apply for a major use permit," the couple's attorney Dean Broyles told San Diego news station 10News.
But the major use permit could cost the Jones' thousands of dollars just to have a few friends over.
For David and Mary Jones, it's about more than a question of money.
"The government may not prohibit the free exercise of religion," Broyles told FOX News. "I believe that our Founding Fathers would roll over in their grave if they saw that here in the year 2009, a pastor and his wife are being told that they cannot hold a simple Bible study in their own home."
"The implications are great because it’s not only us that’s involved," Mary Jones said. "There are thousands and thousands of Bible studies that are held all across the country. What we’re interested in is setting a precedent here — before it goes any further — and that we have it settled for the future."
The couple is planning to dispute the county's order this week.
If San Diego County refuses to allow the pastor and his wife to continue gathering without acquiring a permit, they will consider a lawsuit in federal court.

What is this country coming to???

Wisdom

2009-05-27T07:25:00.000-07:00

Solomon is newly appointed king over Israel. Got to be a stressful job, don't you think? One day he offered a thousand burnt offerings to God, and that night God appeared to him. That's what it says - God APPEARED to him! GOD appeared to him! Just think about the magnitude of that! He asked Solomon what he wanted, and told him he would grant his wish (probably where the whole fairy godmother thing derived :P). We all know what he asked for - wisdom. Not long life, not wealth, not the death of his enemies. But guess what? All these things came with wisdom in God's package! I don't bet I have God's King-of-Israel-Deluxe package, but I know whatever God package I have will be just as profitable to me as Solomon's was to him!

I am currently writing a paper for school, and am asking people this question:

If there was one word to describe God, what would it be?

The answers so far have been amazing!

Awesome

Redeemer

Savior

Friend

Holy

Indescribable (this one has been called cheap lol!)

And my favorite.... Everything

Pray for our troops

2009-05-26T08:55:00.000-07:00

First, a confession - I rarely remember to pray for our troops. But they sacrifice so much for our freedom that it makes my little problems seem like nothing.

God, please bless our troops. Give them victory and bring them back safely to their families. Thank you for blessing America!

Nouns

2009-05-21T08:05:00.000-07:00

Why are there things I feel I couldn't do without? God gave me everything I have, and it's not really mine. Come to think of it, this Earth isn't even home. So why do I hold on to nouns that don't belong to me?

I will awaken the dawn

2009-05-20T09:41:00.000-07:00

This was in my daily Bible reading and the poetic beauty of it stuck to me.

Psalm 108

My heart is steadfast, O God;

I will sing and make music with all my soul.
Awake, harp and lyre! (Or keyboard)

I will awaken the dawn.
I will praise you, O LORD, among the nations;

I will sing of you among the peoples.
For great is your love, higher than the heavens;

your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Be exalted, O God, above the heavens,

and let your glory be over all the earth.

I did this a lot last night. Not out loud, but in my head. I even got to the point where I was thinking up poems. I, the most unpoetic person ever, felt quite like the Psalmist:)

I stand in awe of the oceans,

mysterious and deep

'cause He who made them comforts me

when I cry myself to sleep.

I stand in awe of the forests,

and all the trees of green

because their Maker's on my side

when other folk are mean.

I stand in awe of the mountains,

all the purple majesties

'cause their Creator hears me

when I am on my knees.

Elementary, to be sure, but it was an excellent thing to do at the time!

It feels like chaos, but somehow there's peace

2009-05-14T09:10:00.000-07:00

There is crazy everywhere.

Perfectly young friends are having surgeries all over the place.

There are bad things here and iffy situations there.

You walk around one corner in the maze, and then find another dark room or brick wall.

Dark secrets dance around like so many fauns in the night.

What is going on?

There are so many things I can't see right now. Brick walls, dark rooms. But now I've given up trying to light my own lamps and walk through. Right now I'm just sitting. Sitting in a dark room waiting for God to turn on the lights. Every time this happens and I give up trying to walk through on my own, I wonder why I didn't just sit down earlier. It's easier to leave it to God and just pray. Though praying doesn't always make you quit worrying :)

"Even the best of Christians are troubled by the question, 'Why does an almighty God send, or at least allow, suffering?' When you are nagged by thoughts like this, say to yourself, 'I am still in elementary school. When I graduate from the university of Christian life, I will understand his ways better and doubts will cease.' "

~ Richard Wurmbrand, imprisoned for his faith for 14 years