Blessed Are Those Who Mourn

I am reading a book what I got for Christmas--The Heavenly Octave by F.W. Boreham. It is a study of the Beatitudes, and he has some excellent thoughts. Last night I read what he had to say about "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted".

He said he knew of three different ways to take it. The first is to go to a happy young soul who is joyous and praising God and say with a wagging finger, "blessed are those who mourn, young lady!" It would seem quite confusing and foreign.
Another way is to go to some bitter person whose family is all gone and who's been in prison being tortured their whole life. If you say, "blessed are those who mourn" to them, it will seem to be almost belittling or mocking their situation.
Boreham says that those who Jesus says are blessed are those who have know both joy and loss--when the calm has come afterward. "The eyes, cleansed by weeping, have obtained a clearer vision of life's profound mystery and beneficent discipline. The subject of this third picture knows the secret of the mourner's blessedness."

I thought THAT there was an excellent way to put it.

The Odds of a Man Being Able to Fulfill Old Testament Prophecies

From http://www.chirstfirsttaekwondo.blogspot.com/...

What are the mathematical odds?

The probability of 8 Old Testament prophecies being fulfilled in a man is 10 to the power of 17. 100,000,000,000,000,000.

To illustrate this number take 100 quadrillion silver dollars and spread them over the state of Texas. This will cover the entire state with sliver dollars two feet deep. Mark one silver dollar red and fly over the middle of the state and drop it. Blind fold a man and tell him walk as far as he wants into the state, stop, and pick up one silver dollar. The chance of him picking up that one red colored silver dollar is one in 100,000,000,000,000,000. This is the probability of only 8 of the OT prophecies being fulfilled about Jesus, yet there were 61 major OT prophecies fulfilled in His lifetime.

Walking With the LORD

It has recently been brought to my attention through several different people, events, circumstances, etc. that, well, walking with God is the best thing ever.

Of course I already knew walking with God was basically the epitome of Christianity--if you are a child of God, you walk in His steps. But just recently the full magnitude of what it means to be in the LORD has hit me like never before. If you are truly in Christ, you are constantly checking with Him. Your decisions are all based off of what He wants. In fact, the only thing you want is to do what He wants! It is very liberating to just throw everything over to a God who loves you. I can't figure out why I continue to think things will be better if I worry over my little problems myself. When the little things are in God's hands, they don't seem like such a big deal after all.

And the best thing about being in the center of God's will? You can't mess up! Whoa! Obviously it's not a "Oh, I got in God's will and now I can do whatever and nothing go wrong" thing. It reminds me of the Ultimate Balance Test on Wii Fit. On said test, you must stand on the board and keep your center of balance at 50/50 for 3 seconds. HARD man! As soon as you're in, you're out! You have to chase it down, to keep figuring out how to get in there and keep it there. It's the same way with walking in God's will. You can't do any one thing and be "in the club". It's a constant process. Most of the time walking WITH God means quite a bit of time running BEHIND God, yelling, "Hey, wait up!" :P

But you know what's awesome about staying in God's will and walking with Him? It's fun most of the time, at least for me. The more I study and read and pray, the more I know about the characteristics of my Savior and all the different things He likes. And THAT is cool stuff.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins."

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: "The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel"—which means, "God with us."

When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

~ Matthew 1:18-25

 

 

 

And with this Christmas wish is missed

The point I could convey

If only I could find the words to say to let You know how much You've touched my life

Because here is where You're finding me, in the exact same place as New Year's eve

And from a lack of my persistency

We're less than half as close as I want to be

And the first time

That You opened Your eyes did You realize that You would be my Savior

And the first breath that left Your lips

Did You know that it would change this world forever

And so this Christmas I'll compare the things I felt in prior years

To what this midnight made so clear

That You have come to meet me here

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

In the hope that what You did

That you were born so I might live

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

And I, I celebrate the day

That You were born to die

So I could one day pray for You to save my life

Pray for You to save my life....

Pray for You to save my life

~ "I Celebrate the Day" by Relient K

The song that makes me fall in love with Jesus again every time I listen to it

Chris Rice ~ Prone to Wander

On the surface not a ripple

Undercurrent wages war

Quiet in the sanctuary

Sin is crouching at my door

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

I wake to find my soul in fragments

Given to a thousand loves

But only One will have no rival

Hangs to heal me, spills His blood

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

Curse-reversing Day of Jesus

When You finally seize my soul

Freedom from myself will be

The sweetest rest I've ever known

How can I be so prone to wander

So prone to leave You

So prone to die

And how can You be

so full of mercy

You race to meet me

and bring be back to life

The state of the heart when you come before the LORD

My heart is not proud, O LORD,

my eyes are not haughty;

I do not concern myself with great matters

or things too wonderful for me.

But I have stilled and quieted my soul;

like a weaned child with its mother,

like a weaned child is my soul within me.

~ Psalm 131

What is this but the perfect soil for the LORD to plant in? The thing about a weaned child is that it doesn't know where its food is going to come from. I mean the food used to be just RIGHT THERE, but now he has to trust completely that his parents will bring his food from a source unbeknownst to him.

Exactly the state we are in with our Father.

Stories

Today Stuart McAllister, one of RZIM's speakers, was on at apologetics. He spoke more wonderfully than usual of Ravi Zecharias. I used to wonder if the littler evangelists knew what it was about the great evangelists that made them excellent speakers. Now I know that they know :)

One of the things he mentioned about Dr. Ravi was that he uses stories perfectly. It's true--he always has a story and it ties in perfectly to what he's saying, and he can explain his whole point with that one story. It's really amazing--it makes him easy to understand, and you can see how the point applies to real life just because he told the story.

Stories are amazing things. Dr. McAllister talked about movies, and what great conversation they are, and about WHY they are such great conversation starters. It is because the story is usually one of hope. He used Finding Nemo as an example. It's not just a story about fish. The son gets taken away, and the dad goes off and braves the ocean to find his son, and all kinds of things happen, and OH WE'RE GONNA DIE, and then..........they're reunited and live happily ever after. WHY do we love stories like that? WHY do stories work as such openers, hooks, and attention grabbers? Dr. McAllister says, "The stories we love only work because there's a primal story from which they draw their power".

"If we take the imagery of Scripture seriously, if we believe that God will one day give us the Morning Star and cause us to put on the splendor of the sun, then we may surmise that both the ancient myths and the modern poetry, so false as history, may be very near the truth as prophecy. At present we are on the outside of the world, the wrong side of the door. We discern the freshness and purity of morning, but they do not make us fresh and pure. We cannot mingle with the splendors we see. But all the leaves of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so. Someday, God willing, we shall get in."

~C.S. Lewis

We need to see THROUGH beauty to what beauty points to.

The latest excellent verse

"It is the LORD your God you must follow, and him you must revere. Keep his commands and obey him; serve him and hold fast to him."

~ Deuteronomy 13:4

This about sums it up. This verse is our life--it covers everything. It sounds so easy doesn't it? This verse is what I want to do for the rest of my days on earth. Even if I never become a famous writer, or the best wife and mama in the world, or the smartest English teacher ever, I will die happy if I will have followed this verse. If I have done what God wants, then nothing else matters. At all.

Neither

Remember when Joshua and the Israelites were FINALLY getting to go into the promised land? They'd crossed through the Jordan river on dry land, eaten some of the fruit of the land, and are getting pretty excited. But the bad guys that they were scared of in the first place are still out there. They need to be defeated. So on this particular day, Joshua was standing near Jericho. It was the first place to go. I'm sure he was kinda counting fighting men in his mind, thinking up tentative schemes on how to get over those walls and defeat those people. But then he looks up and sees a man with a drawn sword in front of him. Had to be a wee bit disturbing. He asked the man, "Are you for us or for our enemies?"

Listen to what the answer was! "Neither, but as commander of the army of the LORD I have now come."

Now we all know that the man proceeded to give directions about how to march around Jericho and the walls would fall down, etc. But what really grabbed me this time was that the man said, "Neither". He said he wasn't on the side of Joshua, or of Jericho! It seems he would say, "your side", especially when he was there just to give specific directions on how to defeat Jericho. Anybody agree?

And now here is my thinking. My simple guess is that Joshua NEVER thought, "Hey, hows about we march around these walls blowing trumpets for seven days these certain number of times, and the walls will fall down and we win!" My guess is that he was shopping around for grappling hooks or big ladders or bombs or whatever would come in handy. He was making his own plan. But whatever he was thinking, it is safe to assume that his plan was NOT what God's plan was. So God was basically saying, "I'm not for your plan, or their plan--check out MY plan for YOU!"

These are just my thoughts of the last 20 hours or so. Don't know if I communicated them to make any sense or not.

But God's plan always prevails. Bring it LORD! Not my plan, but yours be done!

A song my daddy wrote that nobody's allowed to steal under pain of jailhood

Beyond

from our view
a moment in time
it passes quickly
both yours and mine

we can't see
what is to come
we barely see
what's already done

it's all laid out
nothing is hidden
there are no suprises
from circumstances we get in

To a mighty God
He sees it all
Our mighty mighty God
Not a sparrow falls
Our God is an amazing God
Beyond time
Beyond the way we think

He's not bound
to any limits
His timeless majesty
shines from within it

His ways are not ours
His thoughts are much higher
Nothing can squelch
His mighty and blinding fire

He's a mighty God
He sees it all
Our mighty mighty God
Not a sparrow falls
Our God is an amazing God
Beyond time
Beyond the way we think

My thoughts exactly :)

Magnify the LORD

I was listening to John Piper's Don't Waste Your Life, and heard an interesting bit.

We are told to magnify the LORD. It is the purpose of our life. But there are two kinds of magnification.

The first is the magnification of a microscope. A microscope brings tiny little cells to the screen, magnifying them and making them look huge. This is NOT what we do with God. We do not make a small and obscure God look bigger through our lives.

Rather, the second form of magnification is correct. This form is that of a telescope. The telescope looks at things like stars and planets, which are HUGE. It brings what is large and glorious into visibility. The planet was already magnificent, but the telescope brings it into view and shows it clearly to the world.

Let's be the best telescopes ever! :D

Glory to the Newborn King

Anybody notice that the Christmas songs are creeping out? We sang this one at church Sunday (and sang it very well I might add). There's always one point in the year where the impact of Christmas hits me--Sunday, listening to this song was it. Hail the incarnate Diety, born that man no more may die!

Hark the herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!

Peace on earth and mercy mild

God and sinners reconciled

"Joyful, all ye nations rise"

Join the triumph of the skies

With the angelic host proclaim:

"Christ is born in Bethlehem"

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Christ by highest heav'n adored

Christ the everlasting Lord!

Late in time behold Him come

Offspring of a Virgin's womb

Veiled in flesh the Godhead see

Hail the incarnate Deity

Pleased as man with man to dwell

Jesus, our Emmanuel

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!

Hail the Son of Righteousness!

Light and life to all He brings

Ris'n with healing in His wings

Mild He lays His glory by

Born that man no more may die

Born to raise the sons of earth

Born to give them second birth

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Listen to this video and sing the words--see if you can tell what I mean.

LORD, I'm your servant

Father, you are the Sovereign LORD,

and I am dust upon the floor.

Your power and purity brightens my life,

though I often block it out and and ignore your wondrous light.

No more, my Jesus. Drive it far from me.

You are the Master--the writer of my story,

but as a simple human girl, I cannot see the glory.

I do not know what you have planned.

Reveal it, O LORD, though I may not understand.

For to obey my God is by far my greatest wish,

and everything you want is what I must accomplish.

I will not lean on my understanding

for even I do not trust in my own speculating.

But I know, my Jesus, that you have an idea.

Let me in on the action--please make your scheme clear.

Whatever you say is what I will do.

My story will be the one written by You.

Uncertainties, uncertainties....

I have come to a strange conclusion.

I'm getting all growed up!

I don't know how or why. Don't FEEL any different. But all of a sudden, all my friends are in college, and going away, and working, and getting married, and having babies and all...and I'M NEXT!!!! College choices, future life choices, all these things loom just outside the door.

Sound a little scary?

What I can see myself doing in the future is getting my degree and going on to teaching maybe middle-school English. But even starting and finishing school is all up to God. Not to mention I'd really like to be married and have my own children to teach at some point. And with that one there's REALLY nothing I can do, or would want to do, to influence that! But what I mostly hope is that one day he'll send the perfect hero my way...one that he has saved and built just to be for me. Some people call that silly or highly unlikely. And to be honest, it often feels that way to me too! Why would God have made someone just for me and me for them? And how will I know who it is? How will he know who I am? The more you think of the improbabilities, the more hopeless it sounds.

But my God is the same God that did the amazing things in the Bible.

Gideon was just some random kid who God chose to save Israel.

God told Samuel the exact man in all of the land to be king--more than once.

He had a special eye on a no-status girl named Mary, and made her the mother of his son.

God hand picked Noah's family and rescued them when he destroyed all the earth in a flood.

And, in addition to all this proof, I know God has a special eye on my life. He even pays attention to the little things--one time I was feeling down for no reason and was randomly blabbering to God, and mentioned that some flowers would be nice. I moved on to the next subject without thinking anything of it, but later I was sitting outside and my lil bro runs up to me with a big grin. He holds up a little pink, wilty, weedy bloom, complete with roots and dirt clumps hanging at the bottom. "This is for you Meg!" he yells, plops it on my knee, and runs away. I was confused for a minute, until I realized what this little thing WAS--a gift from God. I laughed and thanked him, and sat with my little weed, feeling much better :) If God can do THAT, of COURSE he can do the big things!

What am I worried about?

My new favorite quote

I heard my new favorite quote in apologetics this week. You shall hear it at the end--no skipping :) Let's start with a passage from John 11.

Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. "Take away the stone," he said.

"But, Lord," said Martha, the sister of the dead man, "by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days."
Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"
So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, "Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me."
When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, "Lazarus, come out!" The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.

Jesus said to them, "Take off the grave clothes and let him go."

Let us compare this with Jesus's resurrection in John 20...

"Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance. So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved, and said, "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don't know where they have put him!"
So Peter and the other disciple started for the tomb. Both were running, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. He bent over and looked in at the strips of linen lying there but did not go in. Then Simon Peter, who was behind him, arrived and went into the tomb. He saw the strips of linen lying there, as well as the burial cloth that had been around Jesus' head. The cloth was folded up by itself, separate from the linen. Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed."

There are a few major differences in these resurrections. First and most obvious: Jesus was God, Lazarus was a man. But notice that in Lazarus's case, the previously dead man walked out, all wrapped up in grave clothes. When the disciples walked into the tomb, the grave clothes were still there. Now you don't see this when you just read this the first time, but I have heard Christian historians who know how dead people used to be wrapped up say that, from their recorded position, the cloths had not been moved at all. But notice, the rolling away of the stone happened in both occasions. Lazarus needed the stone to be rolled away so that he could come out. But evidently, Jesus went right through the clothes, so obviously he didn't NEED that angel to go up and roll the stone away.

And now my new favorite quote:

The stone to Jesus's tomb was rolled away not to let Him out--but to let us in.

Interesting Bit...

When Hezekiah became king (the first good one in a good while) he reestablished the temple of the LORD and made offerings and set the people up to serve him yet again. He also invited all Israel and Judah to come to the temple to celebrate the passover, something which had probably not been done in a while. The king's couriers went all throughout the land with letters, telling all the people to come and please God by doing this. But you know what? The couriers were mostly just mocked by the people! The people had been distant from God for so long, that many of them weren't open to Him anymore. BUT some people humbled themselves and came to the temple for the feast.

All happy and good right? Not quite. If you remember, there were many rules and that went into the eating of the passover. The LORD was very particular about which hand they were to hold the staff in, what they were to wear, etc. Not to mention they had to go to Jerusalem for a ceremonial cleansing--otherwise they could not eat the passover. But in this case, the children of Israel were just creeping back to God, mostly unfamiliar with his commands. Listen to this!

Although most of the many people who came from Ephraim, Manasseh, Issachar and Zebulun had not purified themselves, yet they ate the Passover, contrary to what was written. But Hezekiah prayed for them, saying, "May the LORD, who is good, pardon everyone who sets his heart on seeking God--the LORD, the God of his fathers--even if he is not clean according to the rules of the sanctuary." And the LORD heard Hezekiah and healed the people.

~ 2 Chronicles 30:18-20

I read that a couple of times to let that sink in. A zillion things ran through my head of what all that actually meant! The LORD just cleansed the people who were set on serving him! The first thing I think of is that our God is the same yesterday and today and forever--he is always devising schemes and sacrificing and forgiving and cleansing so that we may be close to him. I also thought of Peter's vision. Where the sheet full of unclean animals keeps dropping down and the LORD says, "Do not call unclean what the LORD has made clean".

I also thought it interesting that God did it on nothing other than Hezekiah's simple request for their pardon. I have been wondering if, even today, we can pray for God to forgive others of sins they don't know they have commited. After all, Jesus asked the LORD to forgive those who were crucifying him, because they did not know what they were doing. It doesn't say clearly whether God did, but I guess I'm just curious to know the length of God's forgivespan ;)

Any thoughts? What popped into your head when you read that passage?

God is like a Indy Colts game...

I knew it before, and now I know it again! It is sooooo true that His ways are beyond understanding! Just when I am reconciled to the fact the God has chosen to be silent for the moment, He bursts out into something amazing. Not amazing to the general public, but not only did it make my day--it made up for my previous bad days. Our God is always up to something...at first you think He's not going to do something, then He does it. He'll keep you on the edge of your seat, then pull through for you at the last minute.

He is like a good Colts game.

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

~ Isaiah 41:10

It's awesome that God always keeps His promise, whether or not it looks like He will. Lord, thank you for pulling through even in the little things, and thank you for the people that you work through in this fallen world!

Be PREPARED!!!

I am taking an class called FOUNDATIONS OF APOLOGETICS done by Ravi Zecharias. It is soooooooooooooooooooo good. These past 4 lessons have been about what apologetics are, how and why we use them, establishing what a worldview is, etc. I thought I'd post some basic notes from the first lesson, which was really good and revealing.

Defining Apologetics

"But in your hearts honor Christ the LORD as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that you have that is in you; yet do this with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that when you are slandered by those who rebuke your good behavior in Christ, they may be put to shame." ~ 1 Peter 3:15-16

The word we translate as "apologetics" is the Greek word "apologia" which means "to give a defense".

• The command to be prepared to make a defense was given to the Church (not to a specialist)
• The goal of apologetics is not to introduce a dose of confusion into the gospel in order to make it sound more profound. It is about communicating the profundity of the gospel so as to remove any confusion surrounding it.
• This command was given to a church that was being persecuted. The command to give an apologetic was given in a context in which you could lose your life for obeying it.
• The context for this command is teaching about holiness. We preach a life-changing gospel.

1. "IN YOUR HEARTS HONOR CHRIST THE LORD"

• The Greek word for heart is the seat of the emotional and intellectual life.
• Before the command to give a defense is given, we're told that we have to be in the right spiritual place before Christ in order to engage in that spiritual battle.
• Apologetics is not only an academic exercise; it is a spiritual discipline.
• We have become spiritually ineffective because we don't know what we believe or why.

2. "ALWAYS BEING PREPARED"

• The Greek word for prepared carries the connotation of getting fit
• Just as physical fitness requires years of training, the command to be prepared anticipates continual hard work.

3. "TO MAKE A DEFENSE"

• Paul makes an apologetic before King Agrippa (acts 26).
• The apologetic is inherently tied up with evangelism.
• When you're giving a defense, you're not simply answering other people's questions. You're also questioning other people's answers or even questioning the questions themselves.

Why Should We Ask Questions?

1. Asking questions forces people to open up within their general assumptions

• In Luke 18:18, when the rich young ruler asks Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life, instead of answering him, Jesus asks a question.
• Jesus's question undermined the assumption that we get to heaven by being good.

2. Asking questions forces people to open up within cultural assumptions.

• In Matthew 22:15, Jesus is asked a yes or no question. ("Should we pay our taxes?")
• The question is actually a trap
• By asking a question, Jesus forces them to open up within their cultural assumption that paying taxes makes one unholy.
• Giving the right answer to the wrong question is always wrong.

3. Asking questions exposes faulty logic

• In Matthew 22 the Sadducees pose to Jesus what is known as a faulty dilemma. Any option you choose to answer it will be wrong, similar to the question, "does your mother know you're stupid?"
• By exposing their faulty logic, Jesus forced them to question their own question!

4. Asking questions exposes motive

• In Matthew 21, after Jesus cleared the Temple, the chief priests asked him, "By whose authority are you doing these things?"
• Jesus answered by asking them where the authority of John the Baptist had come from.
• Jesus showed that they were not truly interested in hearing the answer.
• Although it is important to expose people's motives, we're going to have to remember to do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience.

5. Asking questions exposes contradictions

• In Matthew 22, Jesus asks "Whose son is the Christ?" then shows them the contradiction in their thinking.
• As a contemporary parallel, there is an inherent contradiction in the claim, "There's no such thing as truth."
• Roger Scruton has pointed out that when people say there is no such thing as truth, they are effectively asking you not to believe them!

6. Asking questions insures a conversation

• People don't like to be talked at". They want to be "talked to".
• If you study the gospels, you'll see that Jesus did preach, he did perform miracles, but he spent an awful lot of time talking to people.

7. Asking questions makes people think

• The difference between an argument and a discussion is that a discussion makes people think.

4. "TO ANYONE WHO ASKS YOU"

• This assumes people are asking.
• The hallmark of a postmodern generation isn't the fact that people have lost sight of the answers, but that we've raised a generation of people who say it's not even worth asking the question.
• Most of the work is not in providing the solution; it's about getting them to ask the right question.
• Our lifestyle should be provoking questions.
• If people aren't asking us questions, the first thing we should do is not blame the society in which we live, but take a look inside our own heart and ask how we ourselves are living.

5. "FOR A REASON"

• The word for "reason is the Greek "logos" from which we get the word logic.
• It implies that the gospel is capable of being explained.
• "Good news that isn't explained not only isn't good, it isn't even news." (John Piper)
• If the answer to why you became a Christian is the same as how you became a Christian, you are not really giving a reason.
• JESUS should be the reason we are Christian.

6. "FOR THE HOPE THAT IS IN YOU"

• You cannot take the Christ out of Christian.
• Any answer that does not flow to or flow from the cross in ultimately a bankrupt apologetic.

7. "DO THIS WITH GENTLENESS AND RESPECT, HAVING A GOOD CONSCIENCE"

• We do this with gentleness so that our attitude doesn't crowd out the gospel.
• We keep a good conscience. We don't pretend to know things we don't know.

Apologetics is the evangelistic theology that is able to walk out into the marketplace and engage with you neighbors, with your friends, with those around you so that they may come to know Him."

The things God does.......

God is love.

He is the very incarnation of love.

Love wouldn't exist were it not for him.

He is incapable of evil.

His word proves all this.

He has never done anything wrong.

He has never made a bad decision.

None of his plans have ever been foiled.

He has good in mind for each of his children.

He doesn't plot harm to any of them.

Everything he does is part of his plan and glorious purpose.

He loved us enough to take the penalty for our sin.

After all this and more, it seems impossible that we wouldn't be able to trust everything he chose to do. It sounds silly to say that sometimes I wish God would do things differently.

The Modern Skeptic by GA Chesterton

The new rebel is a skeptic, and will not entirely trust anything.

He has no loyalty, therefore he can never be a true rebelutionist. And that fact that he doubts everything gets in his way when he wants to denounce anything. For all denunciation implies a moral doctrine of some kind, and the modern rebelutionist doubts not only the institution he denounces, but the doctrine by which he denounces it...

As a politician he cries out that war is a waste of life, then as a philosopher that life itself is a waste of time.

A Russian pessimist will denounce a policeman for killing a peasant, then prove by the highest philosophical principles that the peasant ought to have killed himself.

A man denounces marriage as a lie, then denounces aristocratic profligates for treating it as a lie.

A man goes first into a political meeting where he complains that savages are treated as if they were beasts, then takes his hat and umbrella and goes into a scientific meeting, where he proves that they practically are beasts.

In short, the modern revolutionist, being an infinite skeptic, is always engaged in undermining his own mind.

In his book on politics, he attacks men for trampling on morality. In his book on ethics, he attacks morality for trampling on men.

Therefore the modern man in revolt has become practically useless for all purposes of revolt. By rebelling against everything, he has lost his right to rebel against anything.

And THAT should give you enough to think about for the rest of the day :)

Thoughts of Freedom and Sin

All have sinned and fallen short (by a long way) of the glory of God. We as Christians know this better than anyone else. But when we come to the LORD, we know that he sets us free, cleanses us, and makes us new. An amazing thing.

I am not like some, who had a horrible life before they came to the LORD, but I know this is the case for many. I can't put myself in their shoes of course, but it seems like being free and cleansed in Christ would be a whole different experience than it has been for me. I can't remember any heinous sins I committed before the age of four when I accepted Christ--my relationship with God has always kind of been there and been growing as time goes on. So I can't remember ever a time when I sinned and I didn't get a talk about it with the Holy Spirit. There have been MANY of those times and will be many more. I still get upset over my sin and get frustrated that it's still there--after all, I've been disrespectful since I was four, why does it go on? You know what I mean?

All that to lead up to this: my experience with sin is different than some of those who come to Christ later in life. Some have done horrible things that were detestable to God even before they knew him, and now that they do know him they are very upset about them. Let's say there was a guy who spent every day of his life for 3 years killing one person per day. After the daily murder, let's say he went on to a bank and robbed a different bank of at least $50,000 every day. Then we'll say that every day after these things, he sold all kinds of drugs to school kids and spent the rest of his night causing fights in bars.

All this every day. And then he came to Christ.

After he came to Christ, I guess he'd turn himself in to the law and get sent to prison for...I'd guess that should be about the rest of his life :) But all the while in prison he spends the whole time studying the word, talking to pastors, listening to tapes, becomes a really nice guy, and starts a ministry in the prison that converts several other prisoners to Christ. Now this man LOVES the LORD like crazy, and now he feels as awfully about his life as you or I would. Or worse.

What should his attitude be?

God says his grace and mercy are limitless, and this man would be just as much his child as I am. This much I know. His sin would be rendered powerless against God. But he still did it. It was all still committed. He could bemoan his past and all the things he did, constantly saying what a horrible person he was, and suffer in his dreams every night because of his past sin. He could resolve not to get into deep relationships with anyone because he wouldn't want to involve them in who he had been. If he did these things, I would not blame him in the least--it almost seems that he SHOULD think this way after all that sin! I think I probably would!

But here is what I've been thinking about...is this mindset, even in these circumstances, honoring to God? If God's power and grace are more powerful than this sin, is it right to dwell on your past, now that you are clean? CAN you or SHOULD you behave as a cleansed and righteous one? My gut says that if the LORD has freed you, you are free indeed, and can tell all with a clear conscience that you are the child of God that you are and not different than any other of God's saved ones. My gut says that dwelling in the past is insulting the blood of the Lamb, who has got rid of this past.

But something else (maybe it's my head) thinks that still bemoaning your past and your sin makes sense and is ok...we ARE supposed to grieve about our sin, and maybe if you had THAT MUCH sin than this would be an ok measure to take. Maybe I just think it makes sense because this is probably what I would do in the circumstances.

This probably sounded completely random, but it's what I've been thinking :) Any thoughts?

Esther and delights of reading slowly

Does anybody know who wrote the book of Esther? Because I am reading through it and for the first time noticing how much I LOVE how it is written! There is great description of EVERYTHING and it is such an amazing story! I am loving going through it slowly. We see that Esther, who has been raised by her cousin, is very obedient to him. And in the study I am doing, it brought up the idea that, since she was so used to obeying and being respectful to Mordecai, it carried over to Hegai, who was in charge of her beauty treatments. A neat thought that I had never thought of, that :)

I've also noticed some really funny things about Haman's character. He calls his friends over JUST to brag, and also throws formal pity parties! I'm laughing as I type :D

And here's a nice ditty - Esther knows that food is a good way to open up a request :D The first thing she does is invite the King to TWO dinners before she makes such a great request as to be granted her and her people's life. I'm told by my parents that is is still effective today--and I've used it once or twice myself ;P

Can yall tell I'm having fun studying slowly? ;P

Thoughts on reading through the Bible in 90 days

It was a wild ride! Most days I would start reading in the morning and slowly tackle bits of it through the day and finish it all up at night. There were days when I fell behind, and when you fall behind, it takes a looooooooooooong time to catch back up! :P The best thing about it was that, no matter what passage anybody brought up at church or whenever, I was able to do, "Oh yeah, I just read that" and everything was fresh on my mind. (That being said, it's a lot to have on your mind ;) ) Also, of course, I can now say I read through the Bible in 90 days and that's fun :) Most of the time the reading was fun to do as well, except of course when the days reading is 15 chapters of Numbers :P All this said, here are the bad things about it:

Everything was at the speed of light - no time to think deeply about anything before BANG! You're in the next book of the Bible. And once you start, there's no turning back! It's impossible! Once you have that reading plan in your favorites online it's always there wanting you to come back! Also, with all the reading there is to do, it is oftentimes hard to see it as time with the LORD, as opposed to assigned homework or something of the like. I really had to work hard emotionally to keep my head where it was supposed to be. Toward the end I finally got into a groove of reading half during the day to get it done, and then taking some time on the last half at night for some more study and talking to God. If you're going to take this on, do it this way :)

All things considered, it was a big challenge with not a whole lot to show at the end of it. Though I can't really say this, because who knows? Maybe God trekked me through it because I'll need the experience for...something. Or maybe he cleared out some things in my heart I'm not aware of, or just used it opened a door to make space for something He'll put in my life at some time. So, I shall end with this:

Read through the Bible in 90 days if God tells you to do it :)

Stepping into Jeremiah

Officially 5 days until I finish the Bible!!!! After I finish I plan on doing a study called Beauty and the Pig by Pam Forster, on the subject of Godly beauty. We started it a while back and then moved and never finished it, but it was good from what I remember and I'm excited about it!!! There should be more blog posts as well, since I am not tackling the reading at various times through the day and then getting done at 10pm.

But before then, I must tread the dangerous waters of the book of Jeremiah.

I may have said this before, but Jeremiah is the hardest read in the entire Bible for me. I can't put a finger on why this is, or how to fix it or anything. Not to mention I am surprised that in this 90-day Bible reading plan we are taking almost as long to read through Jeremiah as we did with Psalms. Am I the only one who thinks this way about it? If I'm not, please share your thoughts, and if I am, can somebody give me an idea as to why this would be so that I can fix it?! I don't WANT to dread reading Jeremiah, and there's no blatant reason it should be a hard book, besides the fact that the whole message of it is rather depressing. But not beyond readability, I generally don't mind depressation as long as I know everything ends up all right :)

And a prayer request - most of our kiddos are sick right now, and Jdude's got bronchitis (I'm calling him Bronchiosaurus ;P) and a double ear infection. I've got some sniffles and other weird things and I think everybody's got some symptoms >:Z My cuz has the swine flu too. Pray that flu season passes quickly and without further event!

An aspect of God I never really noticed or thought of before

I love it when people are nice to me for no reason. When I'm talking to someone and they take a particular interest in what's up with me I feel special. When somebody sends me an email, private messages me, posts on my facebook wall, or otherwise goes out of their way to think of me when I'm not even there with them it just about makes my day. I think everybody likes it, but it means more to some than others :) I try to do it to other people since I like it so much. But for some reason I never thought that God ever thought about it. I read in Genesis 15 that God randomly comes up to Abram and says,

"Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward."

How cool is THAT, thinks I!!!! Our God is a thoughtful God! Abram wasn't about to attack an army with a ball-point pen, or stand up to 50 giants with one bouncy ball as a weapon. It was just random--God knew when Abram needed/wanted a boost.

This is what I have noticed and now very much like about God. I wonder how many aspects of Him I'll discover as time goes on? It's just amazing that God has so much to Him anyway!

By the way--go drop a note on your friend's blog, it's nice to do :)

Heads Held High

I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt so that you would no longer be slaves to the Egyptians; I broke the bars of your yoke and enabled you to walk with heads held high.

~ Leviticus 26:13

The Israelites were being oppressed and enslaved by the Egyptians, but God miraculously freed them. You may not be a slave to people, but what ARE you enslaved by? Jealousy? Temptation? Feelings? A sin that won't go away? Maybe all these things. I find I'm enslaved by little bitty sneaky things and don't know it until it grows and goes on and on - then it's harder to beat. But the good thing is... we don't have to beat it alone! It is much easier to talk to Jesus about your slavery than to try and free yourself (it worked for the Israelites didn't it?)

Ready to walk with your head held high?

Almost Pure?

Disclaimer: I address my sisters, because I believe this needs to be addressed. I am not implying that I think guys are any better at this, but I will leave them to their own kind for the moment :)

Most of us have made a commitment to God and maybe our parents to remain pure until marriage. This could mean something different for each of us. For some there are other rules like don't hold hands with guys, don't even TALK to guys, or for some it's ok to get a new boyfriend every Thursday as long as you're technically pure. To each her own--I am not addressing the rules and wherefores of our commitments. Whatever you've worked out with the Lord and your parents if fine with me. But as far as I am concerned, purity, means keeping my body, heart, and mind only for my future husband.

But this is what I have seen recently from Colorado to Arkansas--some are missing it.

Our bodies our pure. Maybe our hearts haven't even been very fiddled with. I'm not going to go into big details about who's doing what and what's wrong when, but here is what I think is going on in this world among the pure--our MINDS are going CRAZY!!!!!

• Guys = toys
• We judge guys by their looks, good or bad (though we all do this with any sex, but it needs to stop)
• As soon as we meet a guy, they are a new plaything or potential relationship
• A guy cannot even TALK to us without our minds playing crazy games

What is our excuse? Not only are these mind games unfair to our commitments--they are unfair to guys. I love guys and I have great guy friends. Call me crazy, but I think a guy should be able to be friends with a girl without her building castles in the air all around him. It even FEELS stupid to type, but we all do it, including me. It's not fair and it's wrong to let our brains do things like that. Not to mention that EVERYONE can read this. Just because it's in our heads doesn't make it a secret. It shows itself in our actions to everyone but ourselves - we all know it is easy to see when a girl begins to drool over a guy behind his back. Or worse, to his face.

I have addressed the least vile and offensive of our shortcomings involving purity. But it is the one I have noticed more than anything else, and besides, if it were anything worse I don't think it would be my place to talk about it :) Can't we just be friends with guys? Is it impossible in this day and age? The brain plays around in every girl - what are we to do?

Thoughts anyone?

I'm doing the Lucy thing

When my lil sis Lucy started out posting bible time stuff she began by posting a scripture and ending with "I don't know what that means". We always kinda give her grief, but now I'm gonna try it out.

"Let him who does wrong continue to do wrong; let him who is vile continue to be vile; let him who does right continue to do right; and let him who is holy continue to be holy." ~ Rev 22:11

This is in the last chapter of Revelation where it is talking about the end being near. So why should the vile ones continue to vileize? Why should they not repent? I'm probably missing something really obvious here, but this is a mite confusing. Any thoughts?

Mighty To Save

Everyone needs compassion,

Love that's never failing;

Let mercy fall on me.

Everyone needs forgiveness,

The kindness of a Saviour;

The Hope of nations.

Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

So take me as You find me,

All my fears and failures,

Fill my life again.

I give my life to follow

Everything I believe in,

Now I surrender.

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

Shine your light and let the whole world see,

We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,

He rose and conquered the grave,

Jesus conquered the grave.

My Saviour, you can move the mountains,

You are mighty to save,

You are mighty to save.

Forever, Author of Salvation,

You rose and conquered the grave,

Yes you conquered the grave

"Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last. I am the Living One; I was dead, and behold I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades." ~ Revelation 1:17-18

Just ordinary dudes

Today Jesus left his disciples. But before he left, they recieved the Holy Spirit for the first time. Now I came to Christ when I was too little to really know/remember the difference, and I can't imagine NOT having the Holy Spirit. Check out how radical it was here in Acts:

Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting. They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that separated and came to rest on each of them. All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them.
Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard them speaking in his own language. Utterly amazed, they asked: "Are not all these men who are speaking Galileans? Then how is it that each of us hears them in his own native language? Parthians, Medes and Elamites; residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya near Cyrene; visitors from Rome both Jews and converts to Judaism Cretans and Arabs—we hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!" Amazed and perplexed, they asked one another, "What does this mean?"
Some, however, made fun of them and said, "They have had too much wine."

Then Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice and addressed the crowd: "Fellow Jews and all of you who live in Jerusalem, let me explain this to you; listen carefully to what I say. These men are not drunk, as you suppose. It's only nine in the morning! No, this is what was spoken by the prophet Joel:

" 'In the last days, God says,

I will pour out my Spirit on all people.

Your sons and daughters will prophesy,

your young men will see visions,

your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women,

I will pour out my Spirit in those days,

and they will prophesy. I will show wonders in the heaven above

and signs on the earth below,

blood and fire and billows of smoke.

The sun will be turned to darkness

and the moon to blood

before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.

And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.' "

I can't imagine how amazing that would be and how many nights I would be not able to sleep just thinking of all this meant to the world from there on out.

Through the Gospels at the speed of light

My reading plan is ruthless - it has me reading Jesus's death, resurrection, and birth all on the same day in different books! It's a crazy ride, but reading different people's accounts of the same thing is interesting, because I remember what Matthew said about the rich young ruler fresh when I'm reading it in Mark 30 minutes later :) But anyway, reading through them this time I noticed much more emphasis on John the Baptist than I'd noticed before. Take a look at these quotes by Jesus about John...

"What did you go out into the desert to see? A reed swayed by the wind? If not, what did you go out to see? A man dressed in fine clothes? No, those who wear fine clothes are in kings' palaces. Then what did you go out to see? A prophet? Yes, I tell you, and more than a prophet. This is the one about whom it is written: 'I will send my messenger ahead of you, who will prepare your way before you.' I tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet he who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he. From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it. For all the Prophets and the Law prophesied until John. And if you are willing to accept it, he is the Elijah who was to come. He who has ears, let him hear."

And then later...

"But I tell you, Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him, but have done to him everything they wished."

John had a neat life - he was born to his parents in their old age and he is famous for his time in the desert baptizing and eating bugs with honey. He was Herod's favorite speaker (even though he didn't understand him) and was beheaded because of a woman who had some problem with him. This? This great prophet that was to come before Jesus? He certainly didn't have the most glamorous life. Most of the prophets in the Bible have this common theme of prophecying and then being persecuted normally like everybody else. But John is a little different than all these guys. We talk about Moses being loved by God and all that, but check John out! I look forward to talking to this guy in heaven one day.

Please pray for my focus (yes, again). I'm feeling a bit flurried and/or distracted in my spiritual life.

This is really all I have to say. 90 day reading is going well, I am staying caught up and all. I think I'll like taking it slow when this is done and actually really STUDY the stuff.

Those Iffy Things

Ever been in a situation in which your conscience was getting pricked, but it really couldn't be helped without being rude? Like maybe eating a ham dinner at someone's house when you don't eat pork, or getting invited to a party that may not be such a good idea. 1 Corinthians 10 addresses such matters.

"Eat anything sold in the meat market without raising questions of conscience, for, 'The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it.'

If some unbeliever invites you to a meal and you want to go, eat whatever is put before you without raising questions of conscience. But if anyone says to you, "This has been offered in sacrifice," then do not eat it, both for the sake of the man who told you and for conscience' sake— the other man's conscience, I mean, not yours. For why should my freedom be judged by another's conscience? If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for?
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God—even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved."

What do you get out of this? Is this iffy thing you're thinking about doing be glorifying to God? It's not an easy answer - if you DIDN'T eat the ham and hurt your hosts feelings, that would not be God-honoring or good for your reputation as a Christian. I found the part about "trying to please everybody for the sake of the gospel" very interesting. If I'm going about offending people in any way, what I believe in and what is important to me is probably not desirable for those around me. Just a little food for thought...

Doncha love when God works these things out?

This morning I read the part in Ezekiel where Ezekiel is getting a tour of the temple by the angel who is measuring everything. Twas quite long and I couldn't get a point out of it for the life of me. But before I could think/pray about it further, it was time for church.

Went to Eastside Baptist. Great worship! Then when it was sermon time, the main passages of what the message was on showed up on the screen. Whoa! Ezekial 47! Maybe somebody knows what this is all about!!! Before we go any further, here is the passage in question:

The man brought me back to the entrance of the temple, and I saw water coming out from under the threshold of the temple toward the east (for the temple faced east). The water was coming down from under the south side of the temple, south of the altar. He then brought me out through the north gate and led me around the outside to the outer gate facing east, and the water was flowing from the south side.
As the man went eastward with a measuring line in his hand, he measured off a thousand cubits and then led me through water that was ankle-deep. He measured off another thousand cubits and led me through water that was knee-deep. He measured off another thousand and led me through water that was up to the waist. He measured off another thousand, but now it was a river that I could not cross, because the water had risen and was deep enough to swim in—a river that no one could cross. He asked me, "Son of man, do you see this?"

Then he led me back to the bank of the river. When I arrived there, I saw a great number of trees on each side of the river. He said to me, "This water flows toward the eastern region and goes down into the Arabah, where it enters the Sea. When it empties into the Sea, the water there becomes fresh. Swarms of living creatures will live wherever the river flows. There will be large numbers of fish, because this water flows there and makes the salt water fresh; so where the river flows everything will live. Fishermen will stand along the shore; from En Gedi to En Eglaim there will be places for spreading nets. The fish will be of many kinds—like the fish of the Great Sea. But the swamps and marshes will not become fresh; they will be left for salt. Fruit trees of all kinds will grow on both banks of the river. Their leaves will not wither, nor will their fruit fail. Every month they will bear, because the water from the sanctuary flows to them. Their fruit will serve for food and their leaves for healing."

Now you all may be more spiritually minded than me, but I was saying, "Wha......???" The pastor gave us the example of his three-year-old in a kiddie pool. It's really fun and great while she's 3, but when she's 16 it won't be the same. He said that the water in the passage was the water of the Holy Spirit - the living water. First it was ankle deep, then knee deep, then waist deep, and soon Ezekiel was swimming in the water. I wondered how deep I was in my spiritual growth. Does living water flow through you onto a dead world, making all live?

So my questions of this morning were all cleared up today perfectly. God gave me the passage, I didn't understand it, so he set up an explanation to the parable in the same day. Oh so thoughtful...

God is Just

Look what I unexpectedly ran into in Ezekiel today! It was a bit surprising because it was in the middle of all the curses of the ungodly places, but I love how God puts in little (or big) blurbs of hope when all hope seems to be lost.

"Son of man, say to the house of Israel, 'This is what you are saying: "Our offenses and sins weigh us down, and we are wasting away because of them. How then can we live?" ' Say to them, 'As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways and live. Turn! Turn from your evil ways! Why will you die, O house of Israel?'

"Therefore, son of man, say to your countrymen, 'The righteousness of the righteous man will not save him when he disobeys, and the wickedness of the wicked man will not cause him to fall when he turns from it. The righteous man, if he sins, will not be allowed to live because of his former righteousness.' If I tell the righteous man that he will surely live, but then he trusts in his righteousness and does evil, none of the righteous things he has done will be remembered; he will die for the evil he has done. And if I say to the wicked man, 'You will surely die,' but he then turns away from his sin and does what is just and right - if he gives back what he took in pledge for a loan, returns what he has stolen, follows the decrees that give life, and does no evil, he will surely live; he will not die."

~ Ezekiel 33:10-15

This passage, to me, seems to be the very epitome of justice. Sometimes God is only even brought into the picture of people's lives when something happens that strikes them as "unfair". When something good happens it's, "Wow I got a raise! I do deserve it, I've been working at this job forever, I'm awesome, I I I I." But when something bad happens, all of a sudden God is responsible for everything that's ever happened. "Why do I have to have cancer, I'm a good person, this is so unfair!" This passage alone proves that God's mind does not work unfairly.

It's not His nature.

I have accepted the challenge!!!

I was just on Biblegateway.com to look up a verse, when I saw a little blurb that said, "Read Through the Bible in 90 Days Challenge Starts TODAY!" or something to that extent. My eyebrows went up and I clicked the link - you know, just to see how it was done...

Turns out they give you your reading assignment on the site every day. I dove right in and just read Lamentations 1 - Ezekiel 12. Don't know what prompted this decision but I am excited about it! Check it out everyone! The way I figure it, it's ok if you don't get all the reading done in that day - reading through the Bible in 90 days is NOT the path to all spirituality folks, it is just an exciting challenge! Join me, anyone? It is Summer after all... click here for more info.

Focus...focus...focus...

Not having a permanent church with good worship and teaching, and a has jarred my focus a bit. Not much - but Satan likes the little footholds just as much as the big ones. I think I'm just spoiled. Hence, I'm being careful to stay consistent with my time in the Word and working on a better prayer life. Pray for me everyone! And pray for our future perfect church to show itself!

Random ramblings to make me feel better that probably nobody will read and that's a good thing :)

The truck is here - we're really leaving. We've got awesome family here helping out with the crazy truck situation. I don't see why it has to be so complicated!

But on to the fact of the matter - today was the last time I'll have walked n and out of the doors of our church until the time in the future that God has designed. I've said goodbye to many these past few days - really good friends - not knowing when I'd see them again, but I couldn't cry. I felt deeply - my stomach would hurt and my mouth would get dry and I'd wish I could cry to maybe make me feel a little better, but I couldn't. But this morning all through service I cried off and on and the end was the worst: saying goodbye!

I bawled.

Hugs all around and goodbyes and everything I really don't enjoy. I still can't believe it's over - all these people that have been friends, mentors, people I can just ramble to, people that will pray for me, people to laugh with, cry with, be aggravated with, learn with, completely lose yourself praising God with, and have basically been a family to me...all this in a little over a year...and it's all over. I was a complete mess to say the least. When I got home I bawled like I hadn't in years - didn't know I could still do it like that.

I still don't know what God's up to, but I guess it makes sense to believe that he does not have plans to harm me - in fact, quite the opposite. Whyever he brought us this far only to take us back I don't know, but I'd be satisfied if it was only to let us be a part of AHBC for a short time.

Now my big question is, what's next? God, you've led us into and out of the best kind of family I can imagine. Now what could be better? I know there is something, cuz You are planning only the best specially for me.

Guess that's worth being excited about.

But right now it's rrrreeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaalllllllyyy hard.

I love you Alameda Hills!

God my hero

Two things we should establish right at the start: Number 1 - I am a big sucker for knights. The sense of "awwwww..." I have when I read all those stories about the damsels in distress and the knights ride in and kill the bad guys and save the girls is the one hopelessly romantic streak in my body. When you have a knight at your side nothing TOO terrible can happen, because he is just drooling for the opportunity to save you. Same with a Dad or anybody that cares about you that happens to be bigger and stronger than you. Nothing can be all THAT bad because there is a hero standing by!

Point two - moving is quite scary and uncomfortable and unpleasant and sad and all those horrid things. Especially when you've no place to go and don't really know why you are going. Yes, there are good parts about going, but we're not at those parts yet, so now is all the bad. For some reason my mindset was that God sitting back watching all this stuff happen and thinking that I shouldn't be feeling how I am about it. Sort of a, "Well fine if you feel that way, you're doing it anyway, so you'll get over it." Don't know why I thought this - God certainly didn't say it. But after I realized this was what I was assuming, God showed me that first of all, he had been the ultimate hero in coming to earth as a human and dying in my place so that I could be with him forever. And now he wants to be my hero in my everyday life! He is waiting for when he can rush in and save me and give me good things and make me feel better.

So now, I'm not so worried about what could or could not happen, because I have a hero waiting for me to be in trouble so he can rescue me!

God makes good out of everything

We all know the story of Jonah, and the getting swallowed by a fish is the most famous part. But I'm going to stop the story before that.

Jonah ran away from God. Deceitful, disobedient, just plain wrong. This was a BAD thing. God sent a storm upon the ship and each person on the ship prayed to their personal god. Jonah said, "throw me overboard it's my fault!" The crewman of the ship didn't want to do that, and tried to row to land, but the storm got even crazier than before. So they said, "O LORD, please do not let us die for taking this man's life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you, O LORD, have done as you pleased." They threw Jonah overboard and the sea became calm. We all know what happened to Jonah, but listen to what happened to the people on the ship - "At this the men greatly feared the LORD, and they offered a sacrifice to the LORD and made vows to him." Never mind all those personal gods - THIS God had just shown his greatness!

God could even use Jonah's disobedience to gather more followers! Not only did Jonah go to Nineveh and THEY repented - the people on the ship all made vows to the God who spared their ship!

Yet another great Psalm

This was in yesterday's reading, but I really wanted to go back and read it again today. It is Psalm 118 and you can look it up if you wish (you should), but I am going to go through and put my favorite parts here...

In my anguish I cried to the LORD,

and he answered by setting me free.
The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid.

What can man do to me?
The LORD is with me; he is my helper.

I will look in triumph on my enemies.
It is better to take refuge in the LORD

than to trust in man.

I was pushed back and about to fall,

but the LORD helped me.
The LORD is my strength and my song;

he has become my salvation.
Shouts of joy and victory

resound in the tents of the righteous:

"The LORD's right hand has done mighty things!
The LORD's right hand is lifted high;

the LORD's right hand has done mighty things!"
I will not die but live,

and will proclaim what the LORD has done.

A good king

I read about Abijah king of Judah today and for some reason didn't remember him from before. In this chapter, Israel and the bad king Jeroboam is attacking Judah. Abijah stood on a mountain and yelled, "Jeroboam and all Israel, listen to me! Don't you know that the LORD, the God of Israel, has given the kingship of Israel to David and his descendants forever by a covenant of salt? Yet Jeroboam son of Nebat, an official of Solomon son of David, rebelled against his master. Some worthless scoundrels gathered around him and opposed Rehoboam son of Solomon when he was young and indecisive and not strong enough to resist them. And now you plan to resist the kingdom of the LORD, which is in the hands of David's descendants. You are indeed a vast army and have with you the golden calves that Jeroboam made to be your gods. But didn't you drive out the priests of the LORD, the sons of Aaron, and the Levites, and make priests of your own as the peoples of other lands do? Whoever comes to consecrate himself with a young bull and seven rams may become a priest of what are not gods.
"As for us, the LORD is our God, and we have not forsaken him. The priests who serve the LORD are sons of Aaron, and the Levites assist them. Every morning and evening they present burnt offerings and fragrant incense to the LORD. They set out the bread on the ceremonially clean table and light the lamps on the gold lampstand every evening. We are observing the requirements of the LORD our God. But you have forsaken him. God is with us; he is our leader. His priests with their trumpets will sound the battle cry against you. Men of Israel, do not fight against the LORD, the God of your fathers, for you will not succeed."

But just at that moment, Abijah and his men looked behind them. During this speech that I loved, Rehoboam had sent men to sneak around behind Judah to ambush them! "Oh no!!!!! What do we do!?!?!" They cried out to God to help them, and it says God routed Jeroboam and all Israel before Abijah. Judah killed 500,000 men. Rehoboam escaped that battle, but did not regain power during Abijah's reign. Finally the LORD just struck him down.

And guess what? Abijah's son was good too. That's two good kings in a row!

Describing the LORD

In the beginning of Hebrews, the angels and the Son are compared. Paul has a great compilation of prophecies and praises about God that he puts together here.

"Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever,

and righteousness will be the scepter of your kingdom.

You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness;

therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions

by anointing you with the oil of joy.

In the beginning, O Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth,

and the heavens are the work of your hands.

They will perish, but you remain;

they will all wear out like a garment.

You will roll them up like a robe;

like a garment they will be changed.

But you remain the same,

and your years will never end."

Is this not as close as it gets to describing God? At least as far as the English language can go.

The Spirit Descends!

Jesus has just ascended into heaven and the disciples are left behind. The Spirit descended upon them like flames. Can you imagine receiving the Spirit like that? First you're sitting around and then BANG there's fire on your clothes and in your heart! I love reading the first part of Acts - it says the disciples "devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."

Can you imagine that? They had everything in common - no fighting about whether they should sing the old songs or the new ones or arguing about choir robes. They were together praising God - how much better can it get? Not only that, they were favorable in the eyes of everyone, and people came to join them because they wanted to be of their number. Now Christians are definitely NOT in favor of the world - too often we're holier-than-thou and nobody wants what we have because of the way we act. We all know what happens later - persecution. But the disciples didn't care, they kept sharing anyway!

May we be like the early Christians!

Heaven

The day I first found out we were moving, I was laying in bed thinking how sad leaving our friends and life in CO. I didn't want to fall asleep thinking things like that, so I pulled out a pad and started to write whatever. Turns out, I wrote a scene in which all of my friends from Arkansas and Colorado were altogether with Jesus in heaven. Jesus kicked the angels off the instruments and let us play them and everybody sang and couldn't stop smiling. After all, what was there to stop smiling about? Even Jesus missed a few high notes here and there, and everyone laughed just for the heck of it. Nobody really could think of a reason to stop the singing and talking and laughing until Jesus banged a pot and called everybody outside to His big big yard to play some football!

It sounded like so much fun, and God's been pressing on me lately that just like I will move away, I will someday move to heaven. I had some preconceived notions about heaven at one point in my life like a lot of people have - won't it get boring after a while? But I'm learning that heaven is our number one thing to look forward to! God didn't invent boredom - he invented everything fun and good!

And now, let me hype up the band Foolish Things. They are Colorado natives that broke up as a band a couple of years ago, but their music is AMAZING. It's not the type of music that sticks in your head as your favorite song - it's the type of music that pops up during the hard times in your life and comforts you. Here is the song, "It's Not Home" from their CD, LET'S NOT FORGET THE STORY which is my theme song for the moment.

Time is like a grain of sand on the beaches of eternity

but we're here toiling, planning

like we'll never leave

I know your fire is coming

What will stand the flames?

Will your return find me running

or blind and lame?

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here

It's not home

I'm shocked to see the measure

of where I've been storing treasure

It's not home

The question's calling louder

"Who do you believe?"

and the answer lies upon the things to which we cleave

I know you're gone ahead

to build a place for me

so I'll trust the things you said

Trust though I can't see

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here
It's not home
I'm shocked to see the measure
of where I've been storing treasure
It's not home

Have we believed the fiction

authored by the world's depiction

of how it is?

Let's not forget the story

we're living for his glory now

You laid it down for me

So I lay it down for you

I've gotta say that I've lived too many days like I belong here

It's not home

I'm shocked to see the measure of where I've been storing treasure

It's not home

I'm not home here

It's not my home

Prayers

"Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place."

~ 2 Chronicles 7:15

God, please be attentive and answer the prayers when two or three or eleven that are having rough times are gathered in your Name. Give wisdom generously to us - we believe and do not doubt.

Encouragement

One of the things God's been impressing on me lately is the matter of encouragement. There's a guy at our church who is really good at it. He always has a compliment and says it like he really means it. He's always ready to listen with his whole body no matter what you're talking about and add a few comments. He makes you feel special by encouraging and maybe poking a little fun here and there. Words are something I put a lot of stock into, and I don't really feel like I know how I did on something unless somebody says so, so I really can appreciate compliments on things. I thought the other day, "If I like it so much, maybe other people do too!" I don't very often go out of my way to tell somebody that their nails look cute, but I should! The Bible even tells us to build each other up.

WHAT???

From FOX NEWS...

Pastor David Jones and his wife Mary have been told that they cannot invite friends to their San Diego, Calif. home for a Bible study — unless they are willing to pay tens of thousands of dollars to San Diego County.
"On Good Friday we had an employee from San Diego County come to our house, and inform us that the Bible study that we were having was a religious assembly, and in violation of the code in the county." David Jones told FOX News.
"We told them this is not really a religious assembly — this is just a Bible study with friends. We have a meal, we pray, that was all," Jones said.
A few days later, the couple received a written warning that cited "unlawful use of land," ordering them to either "stop religious assembly or apply for a major use permit," the couple's attorney Dean Broyles told San Diego news station 10News.
But the major use permit could cost the Jones' thousands of dollars just to have a few friends over.
For David and Mary Jones, it's about more than a question of money.
"The government may not prohibit the free exercise of religion," Broyles told FOX News. "I believe that our Founding Fathers would roll over in their grave if they saw that here in the year 2009, a pastor and his wife are being told that they cannot hold a simple Bible study in their own home."
"The implications are great because it’s not only us that’s involved," Mary Jones said. "There are thousands and thousands of Bible studies that are held all across the country. What we’re interested in is setting a precedent here — before it goes any further — and that we have it settled for the future."
The couple is planning to dispute the county's order this week.
If San Diego County refuses to allow the pastor and his wife to continue gathering without acquiring a permit, they will consider a lawsuit in federal court.

What is this country coming to???